Sick
by liz864
Summary: Bella wakes up one morning sick but is it really just a cold that she has? And how will Edward react to the love of his life being ill? Post eclipse, pre BD. I suck at titles and summaries please read and review and of course enjoy : .
1. Chapter 1

**This is my first fanfic so please review, I'm still debating about if i wanna continue it if i get a few reviews from people asking for me to continue this story than i shall but if not i probably wont. **

"…Ugh" I groaned as I rolled over to look at my clock, 10:00. 10:00? Wait was what right? I never sleep that late. Oh well I guess I was tired Alice has been making run around a lot doing things for the wedding, I don't get it I left her charge partially so I wouldn't have to do anything, but apparently things needed my approval. I guess she took my threat of burning all her clothes if she goes over board seriously. According to her though there were a million other things that I was unaware of and it would remain that way until the big day. If she does anything to extreme her yellow porche will be joining her clothes.

I then realized that I was entirely warm under these covers, much to my dismay, I sat up to look around only to realize I was entirely alone. I looked back to the spot were Edward had been laying as I fell asleep to find a note, written in his perfect cailigraphy handwriting.

_Bella,_

_Sorry love, Emmett had heard about some grizzlies in the area and demand that I come along, I shall return before you have enough time to miss me._

_All my love, _

_Edward._

When will he realize that all I need is one second away from him to miss him?

I sighed at this thought when I noticed a burn in the back of my throat with the intake of breath, how annoying I hated waking up with a dry throat. As I got out of bed to get some water I apparently stood up much too quickly as the entire room around me started to spin, and me being as clumsy as I am fell back onto my bed.

_This better not happen anymore after I'm changed _I thought to myself, I could envision myself as being the worlds clumsiest vampire, tripping over everything in the forest as I ran on my first hunt.

_Please…I don't need any special mind reading, future telling powers just let me be able to walk _I thought as I got about a little slower this time.

It took a great deal of energy for me to get out of my bed and even greater deal to make it to the bathroom, I guess I was really tired.

As I flipped the switch on the wall and the bathroom came to life I was suddenly grateful that forks was always so cloudy despite my hatred of the rain, the bright lights of the bathroom blinded and caused my head to ache.

"Ow" I mumbled as I covered my eyes and held my head, the bathroom lights never bothered me before. Perhaps Charlie had recently replaced them with some new state of the art bulbs that shined like the sun for no cost at all. I could ask him about it but if this was true that pretty much meant I'd have to spend at least two hours with drabbling on and on about light bulbs and how great these bulbs were compared to others.

Once my vision returned and my head stopped aching I took a very large, much needed gulp of water. The burn at the back of my throat dyed down alittle, but each time the water hit it the burn intensified. I was also beginning to notice that burn was accompanied by a irritating itch.

I sighed, breathing in through my nose before exhaling out my out, only to notice a nasally sound emitting from my nose as I breathed in.

_Great _I thought _I have post nasal drip, I must have slept on my back for awhile. Oh well, I'm sure It'll be gone by this afternoon. _I blew my nose as hard as I could and gargled with Listerine to make sure it would be gone by then.

As I step into the shower, I noticed my tiredness was creeping up on me again, I guess I really have been doing too much lately, I could barely lift my hands above my head to shampoo my hair. By the time I was done I was exhausted I felt like I had just run a marathon and I was freezing. And not that good kind, the I've been in Edward's arms way too long but I don't care kind the I feel like I'm skinny dipping in Alaska kind of freezing.

"Hmm" I said to that last though.

_Skinny dipping in Alaska might not be so bad….as long as Edwards with me_ Alaska was were I was to be changed after all. I giggled a bit as I grabbed my robe to warm myself up. It wasn't nearly as cozy as Edward's hard granite body but it would do.

By the time I was dressed and had dried my hair, I was spent I felt like it should be the end of the day with all the energy I had used, but it was only 11:00. 11:00? Since when did it take me an hour to get ready?

I sighed again I only to feel a much more intensified burn.

"…Maybe I just need something to eat" I thought aloud as I went downstairs. Charlie was long gone so I didn't have to make some big breakfast, which I was very grateful for because I barely had to energy to make my cereal.

Eating didn't help much nor was it a pleasant experience. Each swallow intensified my burn and itch to its worse yet and I could barely breathe through the meal as no air could seem to get through my nose. Not to mention that my spoon felt like a 20lb shovel filled with snow. What in the world could be wrong with me? Could wedding planning really had this bad of an affect on me?

And then it hit me like a million jolts of electricity all at once as I watched a commercial for Tylenol on the small TV in the kitchen Charlie had insisted that we needed for the last superbowl. I was sick.

"Dammit" I said aloud, I hated being sick and why now of all times when I was suppose to be getting marr-

"Oh shit" I said a little louder as I suddenly remembered the person I was marrying and how they would react to the idea of me being sick. I could envision it already me being wrapped up tighter than the world's finest burrito in blankets with a cool rag on my head and thermometer in my mouth. I also realized that would probably be stuck like that for at least a week while under constant supervision from someone, I could already hear Emmett's laughing.

I shuddered at the thought of this, but I also knew that if he realized I maybe sick than he would be worrying a million times more than he already did. I've never met anyone worry as much as he did about me, I didn't even know it was possible for someone to worry that much, then again Edward always was doing the impossible. He always insisted on coming with me whenever I went somewhere as if there was an assassin out to kill me and if I so much as coughed even a little he had a look on his face as if I had just been stabbed.

I hate to admit that even his worrying did get one my nerves sometimes, it did make me happy it just meant he cared about me. I know for a fact I would be the same way if not worse if Edward could cough or an assassin was any real threat to him. It just showed how much he loved me, and I know with all my heart that I love everything about him, even his worrying, I just wish he could relax a little sometimes.

I took another burning sigh as I pondered over whether or not I should let him know about my possible illness. I mean there was no definite way to know that I was sick maybe it was just a 24 hour thing.

I slowly made my way upstairs to the bathroom, I searched the medicine cabinets only to find an ancient baby thermometer that was for me when I young. It figures Charlie wouldn't be up to date on his medical equipment, he was rarely sick and whenever he so much as had the sniffles he would go around saying how great he felt, typical male. Maybe there was something to his 'I'm always as fit as a horse' way of thinking I don't recall a time I've ever seen him sick.

Either way this thermometer would have do, I just hoped it worked. I pressed the only button on it as the dormant batteries suddenly came to life as I placed it under my tongue. 3 minutes later I heard a beep, 98.8. Hmm not that bad though I'm sure that if he were capable of it and he was here right now Edward would be having a heart attack. This cold obviously wasn't that bad, my worst symptoms was really just feeling weak, which I could just play off as being tired.

As I thought about my possible quarantine for one week as a burrito and the first mental breakdown of a vampire in history, I decided it would be better to just keep this to myself I would just take it easy and rest for the most part. If Edward said anything I could just say I've been tired from wedding planning, which in turn would make Edward get me out of it and give me more time to spend with him, I liked the way this was playing out more and more. So it was settle I would keep my little bug a secret for the sake of my lover's sanity, I only hoped Alice hadn't had any visions of my illness. My breath caught in my throat intensifying the burn as I heard a familiar Volvo's tires come into my driveway.


	2. Chapter 2

**Wow I'm amazed at the response i got thank you all so much, i have to admit i was alittle worried because I have another story on fictionpress and sadly i've gotten no response, but thank you all even though I've only gotten a few reviews it made me sit down and write. Anyway, here's the next chapter sorry it's short but I thought about it and i realized that if i had her go meet Edward it would have been too long, i hope to have the next one up soon though. Please review and of course enjoy :). **

I leaped as quickly as I could to the door and slammed it shut, I decided against locking it, anyone, especially Edward, would find it odd that I was home alone in the bathroom door locked, and I needed to be as normal as possible right now.

I scanned the bathroom quickly looking for I don't exactly know what just something that could by me some time.

"Bella?" I heard as he quietly came up the stairs, if he didn't just call my name I would think he's still outside in his car with the way he walked.

I suddenly found exactly what I was looking for plus more as I flipped the switch on for my blow dryer. This was perfect Edward would give me time thinking I was still having my human moment and if he happened to feel my forehead I could say it was warm from the dryer. Though I can't imagine why he would be feeling my forehead…unless he was kissing it which he often did…

"I'm just finishing up in here Edward" I called over the dryer, ugh the extra emphasis on my voice burned my throat like all hell.

"Oh alright I'll just be downstairs whenever your finished" he said.

"Okay" I said, wishing I could nod instead. Thank goodness he didn't seem suspicious, then again I didn't get to look at his face Edward usually was able to conceal his voice his eyes were what told me what he was really thinking.

I took a good look at myself in the mirror debating on what type of costume I should put on for the play I was about to perform. I couldn't believe my eyes as I look at myself, I had turn an entirely new shade of pale, one that I'm pretty sure did not exist except for on my skin right now. It was much paler than my usually skin tone but still no where near Edward's pale.

This was bad he was sure to notice with so those crazy 'I can see all' vampire eyes of his.

_Okay_ I thought _lets try not to panic_ my mind thought, I wish it could my hear that because it was racing a mile a minute and with those ears of his Edward was sure to-

"Bella? Are you alright? Your heart racing quite erratically" dam those ears of his!

"Uh…yeah I'm fine" I stammered "Maybe its just form the blow dryer or something" yeah, cause blown dryers are known to cause increased heart rate.

"…Alright" he said, there was a slight pause before he answered and that was all I needed to know that he was suspicious. I was really going to have put on my game face now, did I even have a game face? Wait, that's it put on my face, makeup! Yes!

I dug through my toiletry bag suddenly grateful that Alice had forced me to carry around makeup in case of an emergency, I was still waiting for an emergency that would require mak-…oh.

I used the cover up she had given me to cover up to conceal the slight dark circles forming under my eye, I knew to Edward it would look like I hadn't slept in a week. Odd though that I would have dark circles considering how long I slept for.

Next I took out the blush and picked out a normal skin tone color, well normal for someone whose as pale as me. Of course leave it to Alice to find a makeup kit small enough to fit in my pocket with a million different shades of blush. Though, if I managed to get away this one, maybe I should try and find a way to thank her, maybe a day of shopping wouldn't kill me. Agh! What was I thinking!? A day of shopping not killing me!? This fever must be getting to me.

When I was done concealing myself I took another look in the mirror, I looked slightly better than I did a few minutes ago, it would have to do I just hoped Edward wouldn't notice. I got lucky before picking out the clothes I did, a long sleeved shirt and jeans, they'd conceal my pale skin, if he said anything about my hands I could easily shrug it off and say I don't know.

I took the blow dryer that was still on and held it as close as I could to my forehead without burning it for a few moments, then I turned it off, took a burning breath and stepped out of the bathroom.


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay for starters i just want to thank everyone for their kind reviews, it means so much to me thank you! And also you can all relax in regard to my note on the first chp since i've gotten such a wonderful response from so many i will contiue writing this story and finish it. Anyway im debating about writing a little fluffy chapter in which basically Edward just takes care of her and maybe Alice too, thank to the advice from one of my reviewers ;), so please let me know if anyone would be interested in that because its still up in the air. And also please let me know what you think of this chp, personally i didnt think it was that great but thats just me anyway as always please review and enjoy!**

I made my way downstairs trying not to hold on the wall for dear life, I felt like a boulder had been thrown at me and now I had to carry it around everywhere

I made my way downstairs trying not to hold on the wall for dear life, I felt like a boulder had been thrown at me and now I had to carry it around everywhere.

"Edward?" I said once I got to the bottom only to notice no one was there.

"Upstairs Bella" he said. Upstairs? Why did he have to tell me this after I just came down the stairs? He must have heard come down anyway.

I turned around and gazed up the stairs, there suddenly seemed to be more stairs than there were before. This time, I didn't have a choice I had to use the banister like a rope to pull myself up the stairs, climbing the Himalayas can't be this difficult.

By the time I got the top I wanted to pass out, but knowing that Edward would probably pass out as well even if its impossible, I found some non-existent strength in my legs and made it to my room.

And there he was in all his glory my own personal Greek god, my angel, my savior, the piece of my soul that I didn't know was missing until I had found it, my life….and he was all mine. I still can't believe it, what had I done in this life or a past to make me worthy of him? I don't know what it was but I didn't care he was mine and I wouldn't give him up for anything.

No matter how much time I spend with him in the soon eternity we were going to spend to together he never stopped dazzling me. And he was just standing here in the middle of my room….sniffing my shirt?

"Uh…Edward?" I asked.

"One moment" he said and he took another whiff. I was grateful it was my shirt it was sniffing lest this be even more awkward.

I gaze at my angel and already felt my legs turn to goo, jeez would he ever stop dazzling me? One hundred years from now, when we were married and I was changed, would I still be melting into a puddle every time he simply said my name? I mean he was just standing there….in the middle of my bedroom….sniffing my shirt?

"Uh Edward?" I said, slowly coming out of my trance to fully realize what this Greek god was doing.

"One moment" he replied while taking another with, he said it in a tone like I had asked him for a piece of gum. I was only grateful that it was my shirt he was sniffing lest this be even more awkward. I felt the blood rush up to my cheeks from my own thoughts and I was once again very grateful Edward could not hear them.

"What?" he asked, realizing I was blushing, how the hell did he do that? He wasn't even looking at me.

"Oh nothing…what are you doing though?" I said trying to change the subject.

He was silent for a moment as he took another whiff.

_Please stop_ I thought _I know how good I smell to you but for the love of god…_

"Bella has anyone been in your room recently?"

"Uh…you"

He laughed a bit.

"I meant someone other than me"

"Charlie maybe?"

"No I mean someone new that I've never met before"

"No…why do you ask"

"I'm getting a strange scent in your room, its very faint but its there"

My heart stopped, please tell this was not happening again please tell me there was not people or worse new born vampires sneaking into my room while I was gone. If they took any of my clothes again I was going to explode, I can not handle anymore shopping with Alice !

"Don't worry though I'm not even sure it's the scent of something that's living it could a detergent or something"

"Oh…" the fact that he was so calm helped me relax, if it was something serious he would have A) boarded up my windows with nuclear war head proof shielding or B) already be driving me to his place while he had someone else spy on my room constantly.

"What's that?" he asked, suddenly right next to me his face almost buried in my neck as he looked at.

His cool body suddenly being so close to mine had brought my body some much needed relief as it had suddenly became very hot, dam this fever. Not to mention this closeness made my head spin, how badly I just wanted to collapse into his arms from exhaustion and have him hold me, knowing his presence would be the best medicine for me.

"What's what?" I eventually said, once my head stopped spinning.

"That" he said, gesturing towards my neck again "You have something on your neck"

"I do?" I said grabbing it, I don't why I did my hands didn't have eyes it wouldn't be able to see what ever it was.

"Come let me sho- Bella your hands.." he suddenly said as he took my other one.

"…What about them?"

"Their so cold…and well…a little clammy, no offense love" dam it! How could I forget about my hands! Ugh! I should have washed them or scrubbed them with steel wool, hell I should have just worn gloves!

"Oh…I don't know why…sorry" I said wiping my hands on my jeans. He took my same hand into both of his and rubbed it gently trying to create some friction to warm them. Slowly he raised my hand up to his cheek until I was caressing it, god how he made my heart fly.

"Bella love, you know you never have to apologize to me for something, I will already have forgiven you before you even do what it is you're sorry for"

I couldn't take it anymore and I crashed my lips against his, how long was it since we last kissed? A few hours? It felt more like a few millenniums.

He kissed me back happily and I felt his lips pull up into my favorite crooked smile of his, a smile that will always make my heart melt even when it was no longer beating.

"…Your neck" he said, in between kisses. He has long left my lips and his lips were on an adventure down my jaw line to my neck.

"It's kind of hard to examine when your doing that…" I said breathlessly.

"Breathe love" he reminded me and I obeyed, feeling the fire increase in the back of my throat as I did.

"Come" he said leading me to the bathroom, I could tell he was worried about what ever it was on my neck.

I tried my hardest not to drag my feet on the way to the bathroom, aside from

the boulder I was carrying, it felt like there were smaller, yet still heavy rocks wrapped around my ankles.

When we finally got the bathroom I saved my eyes and my head by not turning the light and turning my attention directly to the mirror. There was nothing there.

"Edward I don't see anything" I told him. Without warning he flicked the lights on and I was more blind than the three mice combined.

"Ow" I mumbled while covering my eyes and holding my head while it throbbed, great so much for my play.

"Are you alright love?" his tone caught me by surprise….he sounded fine, like nothing had happened.

"Yeah" I said, trying not to sound surprised "The lights caught me by surprise, they seem a little brighter"

"They are the same brightness they have always been I can assure you"

"Oh…" I said. I don't get why was he acting so calm? He almost made go the hospital to get an X-ray of my entire arm when I banged my elbow on the counter and now this? He's acting like nothing happened, I really wish I could hear his thoughts right about now.

"Well anyway I still don't see anything on my neck"

"It's right there love" he pointed to the spot on my neck. I had to lean across the sink and hold my neck against the mirror in order to see what he was talking about, on my neck was a tiny dark speck, it was so small I doubt there's a unit of measure for it, figures he would see it though.

"Do you see it now?"

"Yeah I don't what it is though I'm sure its nothing its so small"

"Bella….it kind of looks like a scab to me"

"A scab?"

I shrugged, which surprisingly took a great amount of the little energy I had left, but it was an honest shrug I seriously had no idea what it could be. Then I saw the look of concern in his eyes I expected to see when the lights were turned on.

"Really Edward don't worry I'm sure its nothing"

"I guess…" he said while sighing heavily.

"Anyways we really should get going I'm sure Alice has a whole day lined up for us" he said. Ugh I can't, not today any day but today. Normally I'd suck it up and go, but I can barely lift my finger.

"Edward…can we please just take a break for today?"

He paused for a moment and his ran all over me as if they were searching for something then he looked me in the eyes and bore into me.

"Alright" he said with a sigh. Okay, what was going on? I was sure he would have put up a fight or at least prodded me with questions as to why. I was too grateful to really care nor did I have the energy I just threw my arms around him. And of course, like it was a reflex, he wrapped his arms around me and hugged me closely to his chest.

This is were I longed to be since I woke up, here in Edward's arms, safe, happy and secure. It was amazing how well I fit in his arms and how well I molded into his chest, we truly were like two pieces to a puzzle. I never wanted to leave this spot, and soon I wouldn't have to.

Suddenly he hoisted me up into his arms and carried me downstairs bridal style.

"Just practicing for the big day" he said with a slight smirk.

"Do you really need any practice?"

"No but it can't hurt"

He sat down on the couch and sat me across his lap, I leaned my head on his shoulder while he wrapped his arms around me and held me close to him. For once I was grateful he carried me, I doubt I would have made it down the stairs. This was my favorite place to be, safely wrapped in the arms of my Greek statue. Nothing could move me from this spot, except the sudden gut wrenching pain I felt in my stomach. Oh god no, not now, not when I had finally reached my destination.

"Are you alright?" Edward asked, sensing my uneasiness.

_Oh yeah sure I'm great, I'm just about to hurl all over you but don't mind me, I'll only be a sec _I thought.

There wasn't enough time to answer, hell I hoped there was enough for me to get the bathroom, I sprang from his lap and ran as fast as I could to the bathroom, I don't know what was making my legs move because I certainly didn't have any energy left.

I made it just in time to lose the little cereal I had this morning for breakfast. Edward followed and was holding my hair back, although I was grateful part of me wished he had waited outside. So much for the play I worked so hard to put on, when I was done I tilted my head slowly took at him, preparing myself for the very angry vampire I was about to face.

**Btw i'm sorry for any grammart errors its 20 to 2 in the morning and I'm very tired but i wanted to get this up for everyone. **


	4. Chapter 4

**Okay so i finally got chapter four up, sorry about the delay. And i have decided to write the fluff chapters, it'll probably be two one for Edward and one for Alice, though Edward's will probably be from his pov. Anyway i hope everyone likes the chapter as always please review and enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: i was probably suppose to put this up awhile ago but forgot, i dont own anything from Twilight**

Dammit…after all the work I had put into this play it completely falls apart not even half way through the first act, my audience is sure to be angry. I thought for sure I was really getting somewhere when he didn't pick up on the makeup or say anything about the lights. It was all going according to plan until my stupid stomach had to go and betray me.

I took my time turning my head to face the angry vampire I did not want to see, but before I could ever turn my head enough to see him I was somehow suddenly in his arms, he cradled me against his chest while he buried his face in my hair, then he slowly began to rock me, as if trying too ease my pain.

…What was going on? Where was the rage I had prepared myself for? A wrath that would surely tear down my house, hell probably the whole neighborhood.

My confusion only increased when he slowly picked his head up and I was able to gaze into his eyes. They looked…sad, incredibly sad, upset, even hurt. It was a look I never wanted too see on his face, I felt like someone had pierced my heart with an old rusty knife seeing this look in his eyes, the fact that I was the reason it was the only increased the pressure and the amount of knives.

"…Edward" I said, barely audible but I knew he would hear.

He didn't say anything, he just carried me back to my room, rather slowly actually for him, and gently laid me in my bed. He tucked me in tightly in my blankets but not too tightly, then he disappeared.

"Edward!" I said sitting up way too fast it made the room spin faster than a ride at Disney land. No, why did he have to leave!? Why did I have to be such an idiot!?

I closed my eyes and held my head and I fought to hold back the tears and suppress the lump that was already forming in my dry, burning throat.

"Easy love" I heard. I opened my eyes to see him sitting beside me on my bed only now he had a small wash rag in his hands, and on my bedside table was a basin of water with another wash rag.

He placed his hands on my shoulders and gently pushed me back down on to the bed, he kept one hand behind my head told hold it up slightly, then he took the rag in his hand and gently started cleaning my face. The warm water from the rag against felt amazing against my cold body, but not as amazing as the cold granite holding my head up.

It took me a minute to realize why he was washing my face, then I remembered the makeup, how long did he know it was there? He gently washed away every last particle of the blush, never breaking his eye contact with me though never speaking a word at the same time.

"Your sick" he finally said when the task was complete, it was a statement and an accusation at the same time.

I just nodded in response, knowing that lying would only make things worse at this point.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked, his voice was hysteric and did not hide the hurt that his eyes still showed, I was bombarded with more knives.

"I-I" I tried explain but the lump in my throat was making it difficult to speak, not to mention any movement in my throat what so ever intensified the burn in my throat beyond its never ending limits.

Edward took his hand and placed it against my throat applying a small amount of pressure, I could feel the cold of his skin seeping slowly through mine, slightly easing the burn.

"Edward…I'm sorry I was worried about how you would react, I didn't want you to freak, but most of all I didn't want you to worry, you worry all the time and it's just a little cold and I didn't want to become a burden"

He was silent for while all of this sank in, although he was looking at me his thought were elsewhere and eyes where unfocused.

I was only grateful he had kept his hand on my throat and was easing my pain somewhat, I felt bad enough for putting him through this hell.

"You hear me Isabella Swan" he said suddenly coming out of his trance, his cold hands were now cupping my face while he leaned his forehead against mine, locking his eyes with mine. "Never in the eternity we will soon be spending with each other will you

**ever** be a burden do you understand?"

I just nodded, not really sure if I could remember how to speak.

"Now…as for this worrying I thought by now you would have realized that I will always worry about you because I know that if I lose everything is over for me" he said. Could I really argue with him there? Everything would surely be over for me if he was gone, I had already lived a life without Edward and I wasn't going to do it again, and a world without seems even more unthinkable.

"There is one exception however" he said. I raised my eyebrow slightly to let him know i was curious, still trying avoid using my voice.

I blinked once and then i was in his encricled in his arms tightly but not too tight.

"This is the only time i dont worry as much, the only time i know you are safe" he said, i couldnt agree more there was no place safer for me than his arms.

"..What do you mean as much?" i asked weakily, i felt like i was losing energy by the minute and my voice was beomcing raspy from the burn.

He sighed before answering.

"Well i still worry about my self control and possibly holding you to tightly"

"Edward we've been over this you know you couldn't hurt me even if you wanted too" i said with a burning sigh.

"I dont know that for sure love..." he said quietly. I only responded with another burning sigh, i wasn't even the mood to argue about this nor did i have the strength i probably didnt want face the truth about it either.

"At least you wont have to worry about it anymore soon" i said.

"...I suppose" he said quietly.

I relaxed in Edward's arms, just enjoying the fact that we loved each other as well as his cold body against my suddnely warm skin. It was only then that i realized what a stupid idea this whole charade was, god what was i thinking? I thought about if Edward were human and he got sick i would have freaked just as much and been just as concerned. I would wrap him up tighter than a burrito and watch over constantly even alittle while after he was better. I had tried to push him away and keep him from caring for me, if someone else had tried to keep me from doing that with him i would have killed them without thinking twice about it. All these thoughts cause that dam lump to return and intensify my burn.

"Whats wrong love?" he asked while wiping away a tear from my cheek.

"I-I'm just realizing now how stupid and cruel i was being by keeping this from you"

He crushed me tighter against his chest.

"It's alright love I understand"

"I-I'm so sorry Edward"

"Shh love, I'm not mad and you are already forgiven" he while rubbing circles on my back.

I cried silently and painfully aginst his chest for some time, cursing myself for doing this. All the while he just rocked me and rubbed my back trying to soothe me, telling me it was okay and he wasnt mad. He was just too good to be true, I could never truly deserve him.

"For the future though love..." he began once i had calm down "You really shouldnt bother trying to keep this from me I knew from the minute i walked in that you were sick"

"How?"

"Well Alice she had called and had a vision of you being ill, but she also saw you covering it up, I didnt want to believe the covering up part"

"I'm sorry" I should have known Alice would have had a vision about this.

"It's fine, but i could tell from the first minute i saw you were sick and it wasn't from the blush"

"You knew about the blush?"

"Of course i can always tell when you wear makeup, though I don't understand why you want to try and cover up such beauty, even though you are ill you look so much better without it" he said while stroking my cheek.

"Why didn't you say anything?" I asked, trying to stay focused and not blush.

"Well...because I wanted you to tell me yourself that you were sick, I knew that if i told you it would be pointless and you would have just said you were fine. I tried to give you a hint about my knowing with the lights but it didn't work you really are quite stubborn though I'm sorry it hurt you"

I wondered sometimes if he really couldn't hear my thoughts. He was right i would have denied my illness for as long as possibly could have, i was suddenly grateful i hurled in front of him, knowing that if i had kept lying it would have only hurt him more.

"...It's fine you really shouldn't be apologizing I should I'm the one who hurt you"

"Don't worry about it you are already forgiven and I am already over it"

"Then why do you still look upset" he couldnt deny the fact that he still had so much sadness in his eyes.

"Isn't it obvious? It's because you are ill I don't like seeing you so weak and I intend to do everything in power to make you better as fast as possible..and...well you havent forgiven me for the lights"

I leaned my head forehead and kissed him until i could no longer breathe.

"How could I ever not forgive you? I love you so much I thought it was obvious that I did"

He hugged me tightly while kissing me again.

"What I did to deserve you I'll never know"

"Same" i said with a weak smile.

"Bella...I am growing quite concerned though"

"Don't worry Edward it's just a cold"

"I don't know..." he said "I may not be Carlisle but i do have some understanding of human anatomy no one normal gets this ill this quickly you were fine when i left last night, and not to mention theres still the odd scent and the mark on your neck"

"Well...I'm not exactly normal remember?" i said tapping my temple, indicating that i was his one exception.

"Bella..." he said firmly, I guess he wasn't in the mood for jokes.

"I wish to take you back home and have Carlisle examine you"

I couldn't really argue with the facts, I was getting sick rather quickly, quicker than i could ever really remember. I thought about it and it didn't seem that bad, I was just glad he didn't want to take me to the hospital.

"Personally I'd really rather take you straight the hospital but I know you don't want to go and I don't want you to waste your engery arguing" he said.

"...Are you sure you can't hear my thoughts?"

"Of course why?"

"It seems like it sometimes"

"Silly Bella I just know you well" he said with a smirk "though I would love to know what goes in that head of yours"

"I guess but sometimes I wonder" i said, he smirk grew bigger.

"Though i can't promise I won't take you if your condition does not improve or get worse.

I sighed and before i could respond suddenly started coughing deeply, to anyone who didn't know me they might think I smoke. With each cough the knives that were in my chest had moved up to my throat and it felt like someone had lit them on fire.

Edward just had me close while gently patting my back, I really just wish he'd put his hand back on my throat.

"...Are you alright?" he asked oncei had stopped, i just nodded knowing I couldn't talk.

He took the blankets and gently wrapped me up in them, then picked me up into his arms.

He carried me slowly, well slow for him, out to his car in effort not to make me nauseous.

He placed me in the passenger seat but i had little no strength and could barely hold myself up, before i could really notice though he was in the drivers seat pulling me toward him so I could on him.

"Are you cold?" he asked, wrapping me up tighter, i was alittle but it was the good kind, the kind were I've been too close to Edward for too long. I shook my head, he had a way of telling when I was which kind of cold I was.

He pulled me as close as he could to him and then kept his one arm securely around me while he drove away. He was going oddly slow for him, again, probably just to keep me from getting sick, which I was grateful for the last thing I wanted was to puke all over his car.

The ppeacefulness of the ride suddenly let my exhaustion fully hit me and I felt like the last i had slept was when Edward had.

"Sleep my love..." he said and then began humming my lullaby. It wasn't long before I fell into unconsciousness, but before I saw the speed of the car slowly rise higher and higher until I could no longer see it.

**lol you guys didnt really think Edward wouldnt know about her illness and makup beforehand did ya?**


	5. Chapter 5

**Okay wow I'm really sorry that i havent updated in awhile, I've been really busy and suffering from writer's block not to mention my inspiration comes at random times so again my deepest apologies. Thanks to all who reviewed, alerted, favorited, etc. my story it makes me so happy and keeps me writing, even when I have writer's block or something your reviews are really what make me sit down and write thank you all so much! Anywho, I know i said this chapter would be a fluff one, but it didn't really go over that way as you will see but fear not i will still write one! I'm planning on making it the next chapter but who knows what my mind will come up with. Well anyway on with the story, as always please review and enjoy! You have no idea how much your reviews are appareciated!**

**P.S. for anyone who is interested in alittle challenge there are two very short lines in the chapter that are lyrics from a song, however they are altered by like maybe one word, the lyrics are not near each other nor are they said by the same character, they are from the same song though, see if you can find them. Theres no reward or anything for this just alittle game i came up with good luck! **

**Btw sorry again about grammar i went over this one alot and i think i got them but I'm sry if i missed any, if you see anything like "Seem said" it Esme it got screwed up in spell check sry! Okay i'll shutup now so you can all read lol. **

As soon as I started to see Bella's eyes flutter to a close I immediately pressed my foot down on the gas. I had been going rather slowly for Bella's sake, but now that she was asleep I could go as fast as I wanted. Unfortunately though I don't think my Volvo could go quote that fast, hell, teleportation would have been too slow.  
My Bella, my angel was ill and I could not get her to Carlisle soon enough.  
I don't understand how this could have happened; I'm always so careful with Bella what had happened in the few hours I had left her? Dam Emmett and his love for grizzlies, dam me for needing to leave my love in order to quench my thirst! Then again when I think about it Emmett and I are already both dammed.  
Still where did I go wrong? What had I done to bring this virus upon my angel? Did I not wrap her tightly enough before I left last night? Had I left the window open during my departure? The answer to these problems was of course no, I was always sure to wrap Bella up just right and securely close her window when I left, so then what could it be? This question would haunt me tip I got an answer.  
I made home in record time and wrapped my Bella up securely before lifting her and bringing her inside.  
I walked into the living to see all of my family except the two people I was looking for.  
"Hey look Edward brought us Mexican" Emmett joked, pointing out I had made  
a burrito out of my darling Bella. Jasper chuckled and Rosalie had rolled her eyes at them, Esme just sighed. Me on the other hand well I decided to shoot Emmett my famous death glare.

"Seriously Eddie you sure she can even breathe in that thing?" Emmett joked.

"Uh Emmett you may want to cool it he's about to kill you" Jasper warned, feeling the full force of my anger and it rose through me.

"Emmett…" I hissed "The only reason your still sitting there is because I have Bella in my arms, I suggest you thank her when she wakes later"

"Boys please" Esme said in her motherly tone, calming me slightly.

"…Sorry" Emmett muttered.

"My apologies as well" I sighed.

Esme rose from her seat, walked over to me and looked down at Bella.

"Poor girl" she muttered while stroking her sweat driven forehead, all of my anger completely dissipated and turned into anguish as looked down at my ill ridden Bella.

"I don't know what happened she was fine when I left last night"

"These things happen Edward, I'm sure its nothing and she'll be better in no time, just bring her upstairs so she can get some rest" she said, Esme was always able to comfort me in my darkest of times.

"Is Carlisle still at work?"

"Yes but I already called him and told him about Bella, Alice told us, he said he'll be home as soon as he can"

"Oh…where is Alice by the way?"

"She went out to get some medicine and things for Bella"

I sighed, I was both angry and annoyed at the same time, and I can only hope that once she gets home she will have had a vision about a cure.

I took Bella upstairs and wrapped her tightly in the blankets of the large bed in our room, our room, I love calling it that, I never thought such a simple three lettered word could bring me such joy. I bet that even in her current state she would probably still find the bed unnecessary though, I chuckled at the thought she is so silly.

I went and got a cool rag and laid it across her forehead, God she still looked so beautiful laying there so weak and sick. It broke my heart to see her like this, and yet at the same time I'm sure that if I was still alive, the pieces of it would be beating madly at the sight of her beauty.

I knelt beside her and lightly kissed her slightly cold lips, dam this fever how I missed the warmth of her lips. Even so without the warmth, kissing Bella still brought me one of the most amazing feelings I have ever felt like it always did, to try and describe it with petty words would be an insult to the emotion.

"Rest now my sweet and fear not for I shall make you all better" I whispered while stroking her soft hair.

The in a flash I was in the kitchen gathering items out of the fridge. I set a pot of water on the stove to boil and then went back to the food and began chopping and peeling vegetables at vampire speed. It was only when I was in the middle of peeling my second potato did I realize that I live in a house full people who don't eat.

"Alice" Esme said appearing next to me as she began chopping carrots also at vampire speed; she was going so fast, that to a human, her hands simply would look like an orange blur. I was too caught up in my tasks at hand to notice her come in or hear her thoughts.

"Wait so she went shopping came back and left again?"

"She was worried the chicken would go bad" she said while placing the chicken in the oven, she had already opened, washed, and placed it on a greased pan before I could blink.

"How long has she been gone?"

"A little over an hour actually"

"Esme…what exactly is buying?"

"I honestly don't know but she did keep giggling when she left like she always does when she has something up her sleeve. Whenever we asked she said it was things for Bella's cold, I can't imagine what it could be since Carlisle can just bring home anything she may need from the hospital" she said with a sigh.

I suddenly became very nervous, what the hell could Alice be plotting to do while Bella was sick?

"Don't worry Edward, I know Alice can go a little crazy sometimes but you know she loves Bella and wouldn't do anything to make her condition worse"

I relaxed slightly knowing the truth behind her words yet I was still nervous as what Alice what going to do once she arrived home.

"Wait she went alone?" I asked.

She nodded.

"Why didn't Jasper go with her? It's not like him to let her go out on her all alone"

"Again I don't know" she sighed "But when he tried to go with her she insisted that he stay behind"

Great now I was even more nervous, what the hell could she be planning that requires Jasper to stay home? Those two were just as inseparable Bella and I, why would she want to be away from him?

This was horrible, my poor Bella was ill with some forsaken illness and it was surely in some way my fault, and now Alice was off on some adventure that would probably make it worse. Why can I never do anything right? Even with the one I love and care for the most I screw up, I wonder why she bothers staying with me, I don't deserve her.

_Relax Edward…_I heard, Esme must have noticed me spacing out and used her thoughts to catch my attention.

I sighed heavily while merely turning back to the vegetables.

Esme had come over and placed her hand on my shoulder.

"Edward…she'll be fine" she said.

"…It's not that it's just….I'm sure that this is in some way my fault"

"Edward you know that isn't true"

"Yes it is"

"Prove it"

"…I held her too close for too long…left the window open when I left…had her around someone who was sick and didn't notice"

"Edward those all just silly excuses your making up, you would have known if someone was sick around her before she got to close to even noticed, you make a priority to practically bolt her window shut ever night after you leave, and you **never** hold her too long I don't think that's possible"

I sighed knowing this was true.

"I just don't understand why she even bothers to stay with me Esme; even if it isn't because of the things I mentioned this surely is in some way my fault. I'm not a good guy for her to be with I'm nothing but a freak, a monster, a murder!" I shouted venting; I let my thoughts get the best of me and trailed into territory I'd rather not go to during my speech.

Esme's mind and mouth were both quiet, surely she realized I was venting and decided to just let me finish on her, how awful I felt for taking it out on her.

"…I'm everything a mother wouldn't want in a son" I said and I wasn't venting this time, I was merely stating a fact about how horrible I truly am.

Esme had realized I wasn't venting and she did something I didn't think she was even capable of, she turned me around to face her and slap me across my face.

The look in her eyes was one of pain and hurt, if she could shed tears they'd be running down her face faster than a water fall.

"…You take that back right now" she said through her sobs. I didn't fully comprehend what she said; I had never been slapped by anyone in my life, both living and dead. I was hit, beaten, thrown, etc. but never slapped, and by her of all people!

_Take it back!_ She shouted in her mind, no longer able to talk through her sobs.

"…I'm sorry" I said quietly, faster than an instant she threw her arms around me in a motherly embrace and held me close.

_You listen to me Edward Cullen you are, without a doubt in my still heart, everything a mother could ever want in son and I will kill anyone who says diff and that includes you_ she thought while sobbing slightly.

_Of course you think you don't deserve Bella, she's thinking the same thing about you trust me, and I think the same way about Carlisle. It just shows how much you two love each other, how wonderful you each look in each other eyes, how you both don't know why this amazing person bothers to stay with you but you know you couldn't go on living if they didn't. It doesn't really matter if you deserve each other or not what matters is you two chose each other over every other person in the world and neither of you ever want it to change. _

She was right. Every last word was true, how could I ever truly deserve Bella? If I cured cancer, solved world hunger, and ended the war in the Middle East peacefully all in one day I would still not even come close to deserving someone as wonderful as her, but I know, all too well than I would like too, how pointless and miserable my life is without Bella. As long as she wants me to stay, I will never leave or abandon her, that's what the ring on her finger means.

"…Thanks mom" I said hugging her tightly, and she kissed my messy hair.

"Of course son…" she said, finally calming down from her sobs.

"And Edward I know you still have trouble moving on from your past just know that all of us, especially me, is here for you whenever you may need us we'll all done things we regret.

I just nodded, the only way I can really cope with my past is to not think about it, which really isn't all that hard all I have to do is think of Bella….Bella….her warm skin….her exquisite chocolate brown eyes….her lovely smile.

"Edward?" Esme said.

"Sorry" I said, shaking my head out of my trance, what that girl does to me and here she's not even in the room.

Esme smiled; obviously she knew who I was thinking about.

_Go to her I'll finish up here _she thought.

"No it's fine besides I wan-" I protested.

"You want to be with her, now go" she said, pushing me out of the room. It was odd having these feelings around Esme, yet it didn't feel wrong, actually I felt better, I felt like even if her cold was somehow my fault it didn't matter what matter now is that she was sick and needed someone to take care of her and I was more than eager for the job.

I passed Emmett and Rosalie on my way up, Jasper had disappeared and Emmett was now holding Rosalie securely in his lap as she rested her head on his chest.

"Where'd Jasper go?" I asked, I felt I should say something they all heard what had happened in the kitchen, it was impossible for them to have not, I just wondered if the emotions became too much for him to stand.

"He couldn't take it anymore and he went to look for Alice" Emmett answered.

"Why didn't he just call her?" I asked.

"Because A) she left her phone here because she knew he wouldn't stop calling and B) even if she had it and picked up she would have just yelled at him to stay home" Rosalie said.

I was hoping that was the truth and it was just because of me and Esme.

_Don't worry it wasn't because of the incident in the kitchen he was truly worried about her and don't bother apologizing for it none of us mind like Esme said we've all done things we regret and we all have our good and bad days_ Rosalie thought.

She was rather sympathetic in her thoughts, uncommon for her but I guess she understood what I was going through to a degree, she had taken lives before, but not for the same reasons as me and not nearly as many.

_Edward look I don't care about what you and Esme said I'm really cool with it but…can you like…leave I'm about to get some_ Emmett thought.

I shuddered at his thoughts and quickly made my way up the stairs; I just hoped they didn't wake my Bella.

My Bella….she was still sleeping soundly as I walked into our room, again I felt a spark of joy at the thought of it _our_ room. I walked over not making a sound and gently stroked her cold cheek. How it killed me to see her this way, so cold and weak.

I gently leaned over and kissed her soft lips not being able to contain myself.

"Get well soon love...or soon I won't be well either" I said while holding her hand. I knew without a doubt I would be the first vampire in all of time to become ill if her condition did not improve.

"…Edward" she murmured. Ah one of my most favorite things about Bella, her sleep talking, the only time I am able to gain entrance into her mind and discover what goes on in there.

"...Edward" she said again I began to stroke her again how soft and wonderful it felt in between my fingers.

"…Edward…I want…" she whispered. Want? This was new when did Bella ever want anything? There were so many things I wanted to give her, but alas with her hatred of gifts I could not. She has never mentioned wanting something, aside from eternal damnation…and…well me. I wondered if it was one of the two she was now speaking of; I only hoped it was the second.

"….I want" she repeated.

"…What? What do you want love?" I took the hand I was holding and gently kissed the inside of it and then held it against my chest while rubbing circles on it with my thumb.

"…I want" she said again.

"Tell me what you want and you can have it" how wonderful it would be to know something she wanted and be able to have it to her without realizing I knew about it, I could only imagine the look on her face, and how adorable it was!

"…I want…I want….to live on the moon" she said.

My hand stopped dead in her hair; did I just hear her right? Of course I did I never heard anything wrong. Could this really be true? Did my angel have a secret desire to be an astronaut? Of course she'd be the most amazing beautiful astronaut ever, but still….the moon? She has never mentioned anything about space outside of when she's doing something for astronomy in school.

…Though…if this is what she really wanted how could I deny her it? I could live on the moon if she wanted too, I didn't care were we lived as long as she was there with me…I guess I'll have to look at rockets.

"…We can have a farm there…and we'll raise chickens"

A farm? And chickens? Chickens can't survive in space I'm sure of it…but…still if Bella wanted it….what strange things she desired I hadn't the slightest clue.

I stood up thinking over how I would meet my loves sudden and strange desires when I stepped on something squishy. I looked down to see the rag I had placed on her forehead earlier had fallen on the ground, then it all made sense, her fever, she was delirious. I sighed in relief at knowing I was not going to become the first vampire farmer to live on the moon, I don't think the world, or me for that matter, is ready for that one.

I looked back at my sweet Bella and was saddened to know how badly this fever was affecting her, yet it was interesting to see how incredible her imagination could be, she should write a book one day.

I went over to the bathroom and ran the water hot this time hopefully to warm her cold body a little. How desperately I wished I could do that, what I would give be able to give her a little warmth every now and then, especially when she needed it the most.

I must have gotten caught up in my thoughts, before I could notice the entire mirror had fogged over.

I dried my hands and wiped the fog off the mirror, I fixed my hair as some of it had fallen out of place, not that it really had a place being as messy as it was, what shock me though was the feeling of my hand against my head….it was so incredibly…warm, even a little hot.

"…the water" I murmured as I looked down at the sink and the idea hit me faster than lighting. I ran over to the tub and quickly turned on the water so it would be as hot as possible.

I went back over to Bella gently placed the rag on her head and then kissed her again.

"I'm going to make you sweat more than the sun my dear" I whispered.

I went back in the bathroom, stripped down, and practically dove into the scalding hot water. I would stay here in this boiling water until my love awoke.


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you everyone who read and reviewed it really means alot to me that you all like my story so much thank you! And ugh I am so sorry i can't seem to upload these chapters quicker I've been really tryin buti still have writer's block sometimes so I'm sorry, you guys deserve a better author. Anyway, please keep in mind while reading this chapter that I am no doctor and I can only researc what Bella has so much, don't worry I know it may not make sense now but it will in the end. I don't know when ill get he next chapter up ill try to asap though, its probably gonna be from Alice's POV but im still undecided, but anyway as always please review and enjoy.**

I lay there in the tub with my eyes closed for sometime, I blocked out all thoughts and sounds except for Bella's breathing and her heart beat

I lay there in the tub with my eyes closed for sometime, I blocked out all thoughts and sounds except for Bella's breathing and her heart beat. I paid close attention to the rhythm and how often they both occurred; I counted them both separately in my head.

10,982 breaths and 20, 562 heart beats later, she rolled over.

20,855 breaths and 36,432 heart beats later, she groaned.

50, 757 breaths and 90,329 heart beats later, she started to cough, and that was my signal to get out the tub. I climbed and dried myself off and put on a fresh pair of clothes, I'm sure that if I was human I would have instantly frozen when I got out.

"Edward?" I heard her gently whisper, her voice was already becoming raspy. Dam those germs for damaging her throat, how dare anyone or thing, no matter how small, harm her in someway!?

Before she could have a chance to fully look around the room for me I was laying in bed next to her wrapping my arms around her and holding her as close to me as I could without hurting or cutting off her air supply.

"…Edward" she said shockingly, I looked at her with my crooked smile she adores so much.

"…Your warm…really warm…how?"

"It was an idea I got while you were asleep, I laid in the tub with the water as hot as it possibly could be until you woke up"

"…You cooked yourself?"

"I suppose that's one way to put it" I said with a chuckle.

"Why though?"

"Isn't it obvious? I wanted to warm you up" I said pulling her closer and kissing her hair.

"…Oh Edward…" she said with shock, her eyes were beginning to get watery.

"Does it not please you?" I asked, shocked by the tears forming in her eyes.

"Of course it does more than you can imagine, thank you so much" she said while snuggling into my chest.

"Then why the tears?" I said, wiping one away.

"Tears of joy" she said with smile.

Finally, her smile had returned, it seemed stronger than before, perhaps she was over come with joy, or, like I hoped, she was finally getting better.

"The only kind of tears I'm glad to see on your beautiful face"

"Thank you so much" she said with a kiss, which I happily returned, I could feel the both of us smile into it.

"No thanks necessary, you know I would do anything for you" I told her, once I pulled away allowing her to breathe.

"And I you"

"I love you Bella"

"I love you too Edward"

I kissed her again with more passion this time but still gently, she kissed me back earnestly, god what I would do to just be able to kiss her forever, our lips forever locked in their wide smiles against each other. When that thought crossed my mind, I realized that my wish would soon be granted…How I will miss the pitter patter of her heart while it happens.

I pulled away again to give her some air, but I refused to leave her face, I kissed every spot that was available, her cheeks, her eyes, her nose, her forehead, the hollow behind her ear, down her jaw line to her chin then down her neck.

Perhaps a part of me hoped that kissing her like this would cure her of this horrid disease, but for the most part I really just couldn't stop myself, she was so beautiful and soft how could I not kiss her? Sometimes I would find it difficult to hold a conversation with her because my desire to hold and kiss her was just too great.

I made my way back of up her neck stopping at her lips and crushing mine against hers, her heart was beating so widely I thought a rib just might break and her breath was extremely crazed, I smiled my crooked smile into the kiss, loving that I had this affect on her. I only hoped she did misinterpret me like she had that one night when I gave her the wrong idea. Of course I truly longed for her the same as well, to be come one with her, even now I wanted her badly, but I would never take her innocence while she was in this state, no matter how willing she maybe, and I could tell she was rather willing despite our previous conversation of how she wanted to wait.

My thoughts and actions were suddenly interrupted by a familiar gurgling sound; I couldn't help but chuckle at.

"…Sorry" she muttered, her face was flooded with so much crimson I wondered if there was blood anywhere else in her body. It looked even redder against her paler skin, how beautiful.

"Don't be sorry you're just hungry when was the last time you ate something?"

"Well…I had a little cereal before you came this morning…but I…kind of lost it"

I sighed as the memory came back to me, which was something I really prefer not to remember as well as never see again. It tore my heart to shreds to see her being ill like that and knowing that all I could was hold back her hair. I felt so completely useless, not to mention weak, which for me was new.

I propped myself and my angel up to a sitting position, she kept her head resting on my shoulder while keeping one arm around my waist holding on to me. I kept one arm around her shoulders and my other around her waist pulling her closer to me.

"Here" I said handing her a mug. She took the mug by the handle and not a second after I let go it her arm began to shake, a spill was imminent, so I immediately took it back from her. My poor Bella, I guess my earlier hopes of her being better were not true if she can't even hold a mug.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Its chicken soup, Esme and I made it for you"

"Oh Edward you didn't have too"

"I wanted too, be careful though it's hot"

She put her hand on the side and took a sip.

"Edward…it's delicious" she said taking another sip. I smiled down at her glad to see she was enjoying it.

"I'm glad you like it" I told her.

"I love it" she said drinking happily.

She drank ever last drop of it in one large chug, I guess she was hungry.

"Is there more?" she asked.

"Yes but I think we should wait for a little while, make sure you can keep that down" I said rubbing her stomach slightly.

"Alright, I'm actually not all that hungry It just felt good on my throat" she sighed and then coughed, my face twisted in agony as she gagged, I quickly gave her the water bottle I had gotten for her. She again took a large chug and by the time she was done half the water was gone.

"Are you alright?" I asked pulling her back over to me and crushing her against my chest.

She only nodded I could tell this cold was causing her throat much pain by the lack of her words, that sudden coughing fit must have only deepened the pain, how I missed her angelic voice even if it was a little raspy.

I kissed her forehead softly and noticed the raging fire beneath my lips.

"My goodness Bella you're burning up!" I said not hiding the worry in my voice or face, it would be pointless to try and hide it for it was impossible.

I placed my hand against her forehead; despite the added heat on my palm I could feel the fire beneath my hand.

"101.8…" I said quietly.

Her face became a look of confusion and shock, I guess she was surprised by ability to suddenly be a thermometer, I merely responded to it with a shrug.

She just stayed as close to me as she could and I kept her as close as I could wanting to take full advantage of my warm body while it lasted.

We sat like that for sometime, clinging together and holding each other, in complete silence. Bella and I didn't always need to talk when we were together; just having our arms around one another was more than enough.

I must admit I was a little upset when I heard Carlisle come home, knowing that our peacefulness would be disturbed.

"Hello Edward, Bella, how are we doing today?" he said coming into our room. He seemed much too cheerful despite my Bella's condition, although with his job he has to be.

"We've been better" I said, Bella nodded in agreement.

"Well there have been quite a few cases of the flu going around it could be that but I won't know for sure unless I get a chance to look at you, do you mind Bella?"

She again shook her head.

Carlisle came over and sat on the edge of the bed near us. He gently placed his hand on her forehead.

"102.1 my goodness Bella" He said.

"Wait that can't be right I just took her temperature it was 101.8" I said, perhaps I wasn't as good and thermometer as I thought. I placed my hand on her forehead once against only to have my fears realized that he was right, Bella's fever had gotten worse, and it had barely been an hour.

"…What are your other symptoms" He asked, trying to change the subject.

Bella tilted her head up slightly looking at me, she had a look in her as if asking me to do something, it all clicked when she slowly lifted her hand to point at throat slightly.

"She been experiencing an intense burn in the back of her throat, which is why I'm answering you, she's been feeling very weak, weaker by the minute, actually and you already know about her fever, did I miss anything?" I asked gazing down at my sweet angel.

She simply shook her head.

"It sounds like rather bad cold, or possibly pneumonia yet if I remember correctly, and I'm pretty sure I do, you were perfectly fine when you came over yesterday right Bella?"

She nodded.

"That's why were all so confused Carlisle; she was fine when I left her last night"

"Sorry Bella but could you answer a few questions?"

"…Its fine" she said, her voice was very low and hoarse, I doubt a human could hear it, I'm guessing she took advantage of our hearing.

"What happened when you woke up this morning?"

"I woke up and my throat was a little dry and there was a slight burn in the back of it, I got some water but it didn't help. I was also felt really tired and a little weak, then I got a fever, the symptoms just got worse throughout the day, by the time Edward got there I could barely walk and I-" her speech was cut off by another sudden coughing fit, I rubbed soothing circles on her back and handed her the water again.

Much to my surprise she pushed the water away and sat up, coughing more deeply this time, her small body shook with each cough while she clutched her chest, how it pained me to see her like this the pain in her throat is nothing compared to the pain in my heart seeing her like this.

Each time she coughed if felt as if someone was ripping my heart out and stomping repeatedly on it on the ground.

She had moved one hand from her chest to her mouth and covered her mouth in an effort to try and stay quiet but it was pointless, everyone in the house could hear her.

Then suddenly, she stopped coughing yet she kept her mouth covered and a look of horror spread across her face as a sweet, sweet aroma filled the air and realized why.

The few times I have smelled this scent before have without a doubt been the most horrible times in my life despite its wonderful aroma. I pushed back the monster inside of me knowing that if I followed this scent it would lead me to a pain worse than death.

I glanced over at Carlisle's and his expression caught me off guard, he did look concerned by he also looked as if he were studying Bell, studying her with black eyes which I knew were a reflection of my own.

She slowly moved her hand away from her mouth down to her lap and kept balled up tightly into a fist.

"…Let me see your hand" I said.

She shook her head.

"Let me see it" I said firmly. I didn't need to see it to know what was on them but I wanted to prove to her that despite my now black eyes, I was in control.

She wasn't having it though, she remained frozen barely breathing.

I slowly placed my hand on top of hers, she shot me a nervous glance, I remained composed letting her know it was okay.

Slowly I unclenched her hands from the tight fists they previously were to reveal her blood stained hand.

My poor Bella, what was happening to her small body? Why was she so sick? I've always been so careful with her when we went out. If anyone so much as sneezed I removed her from the vicinity at vampire speed regardless of what we were doing.

"…Bella" I said not hiding the horror in my voice.

Her beautiful chocolate brown eyes immediately became glassy and I crushed her against my chest.

She slowly began to cry against my chest, sobbing heavily I could only imagine the pain this was causing her throat.

"Shhhh it's alright…" I said while rubbing her back trying to soothe her.

"I-I'm sorry" she choked out.

"What for my love?" I said while tilting her head up to look into her glorious eyes.

"For the blood I know it's causing you and Carlisle pain"

"Bell yes I am in pain but it is not from your blood it is because your sick and it kills me to see you like this. Drinking your blood is the farthest thing from my mind because I know how much pain it would cause me both physically and emotionally" I said in all honesty, I was a little surprised how easy it was to restrain myself. Our adventure in Italy must have made my resistance to her blood stronger than I even realized.

"Your eyes…" she said.

"Its kind of a reflex, yes it means I'm thirsty but it doesn't mean I'm not in control, I assure you I'm perfectly fine with that part of myself" I said truthfully with a shrug, my thirst was my least of my concerns right now.

"But what about everyone else?"

"Well Alice and Jasper are out, Carlisle is in complete control I assure you despite his eyes, Esme is fine as well she wouldn't dream of hurting you if she could dream, as for Emmett and Rosalie their a bit…well….occupied at the moment" I explained, I took this chance to use the still damp rag I had earlier placed on her forehead to clean off her hand and further prove my control to her.

I saw that beautiful rose color spread across her cheek after my last statement, god she was so beautiful.

I wiped away her tears gently with my thumbs while cradling her face in my hands, and as if I could resist I kissed my sweet angels lips before I could even finish.

_Edward may I come back? I'm sorry but I really need to get a look at her_ I heard Carlisle think, I hadn't even realized he left, he must have wanted to give us some privacy.

"Its fine Carlisle" I said aloud and he immediately reappeared in our room.

"I'm so sorry Carlisle" she said.

"Bella its fine you have nothing to be sorry for" Carlisle responded.

This was so like my Bella, so concerned with hurting the rest of us when she was the one actually hurting, god I love this woman.

It was then that I noticed a few empty vials sticking out of Carlisle's pocket, the kind that I immediately realized were used for blood work.

"Carlisle…" I said nervous; please tell me he didn't want to do what I thought he wanted to do.

"Edward…I must you see how extreme her condition is"

"No" I said firmly.

"Edward don't be irrational" he told me.

Bella gently tapped my shoulder, looking as me with a curious look on her face, I knew she was just trying to avoid using her voice again but still that face was so adorable. "He wants to give you a blood test" I said with a sigh.

She responded by taking her arm out from under the covers and holding it out towards Carlisle.

"Bella no" I said while grabbing her and gently holding her hand against my chest.

"Why not…?" she said in her barely a whisper voice, I only hoped that when she talked like this it didn't cause her much pain.

"Your in enough pain as is, I don't want too see you in anymore"

"Edward I'll be fine beside I trust Carlisle it won't hurt that bad I've gotten shots from him before"

I sighed in defeat, she was right he would make it near painless and I suppose it was necessary, even Carlisle seemed confused as to exactly what her condition was.

"…Will you two be alright though?" she asked.

"Of course we'll be fine" I said with all confidence and Carlisle nodded in response.

She nodded and once again held her hand out for Carlisle who gently took it and cleansed the top of her hand with an alcohol pad.

I made sure to keep my arms around her holding her tightly to my side as she kept her head resting on my chest.

As soon as Carlisle took the needle out I put my hand on the side of her cool cheek, sadly I could tell that by now the effects of my bath had worn off but she still did not appear to be cold or uncomfortable. I gently pulled her face upward and locked her eyes with my own.

"Don't look" I told her.

I got lost in the chocolate brown eyes of this amazing creature picking out all the things I loved about her and finding none that I disliked. She had to be okay to had to pull through this illness I would make sure of it because there is nothing without her.

"All done" Carlisle said placing and bandage over the area were he drew the blood.

Her face mirrored mine in the matter of how fast he had done that and how we both didn't even realize he started, I didn't even smell the blood I was too preoccupied with Bella, I guess she can say the same about me.

"Edward if you don't mind I would like to have a word with out outside for a moment"

I sighed but nodded; if he wanted to speak with me it must have been important.

I laid my angel back down on the pillows and gently kissed her wonderfully soft lips.

"I'll be right outside, if you need anything just whisper I'll hear you" I said while tucking a piece of her hair behind her ear.

Her glorious smile spread across her face while she nodded, sadly though it was a weak smile.

"What is it Carlisle?" I asked once we in the hall I made sure to talk at a frequency that only vampires could hear I did not want to worry my Bella.

"Edward I need you to accompany me back to the hospital"

"What for?" I asked outraged, how dare he even think about dragging me away from my Bella.

"Son….in all my years as a doctor I've never seen something like this"

"…What do you mean" I asked, if I was capable of passing out I surely would have.

"She has pneumonia Edward I can hear the liquid in her lungs as she coughs, but I can also hear the extra room of her bronchi due to inflammation when she breaths. I can tell she's having chest pains and the fact that she's coughing up blood means she most likely has Tuberculosis. I have never seen any human become this ill with this many different diseases this quickly"

I know I only had my vampire strength to thank me for not collapsing upon the floor. My Bella what was happening to her? Why was she so ill? Could she pull through? Yes she has too she has to live I need her to live.

"I need you to come with me to the hospital to help me figure out what's going on Edward"

I didn't know how I managed to understand Carlisle with all of the emotions that

were going through me. Pain, worry, agony….the list goes on, I can only say it was a

good thing that Jasper wasn't around surely he wouldn't have been able to handle it, then again I'm not really sure how I did, I guess it was because she was still alive yet I didn't know how much longer that would last.

"Carlisle…I don't know" I said, my hands shaking a bit, I didn't think vampires could shake.

"Please son…I'm going to need all the help I can get if I'm going to cure her, you're the only vampire here who has medical experience besides me"

"I…I don't want to leave her"

"I know son and I'm sorry"

"I can't Carlisle, especially not alone"

"And that's were I come in!" Alice chimed as she skipped down the hall.

**Again sorry about any grammar errors, if anyone is confused feel free to message me and please review!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Alright wow I am so sorry about that before but I didn't want you guys to have to read something that was confusing and didn't make sense. I pretty sure everything should be fine now but if anyone confused by anything just let me know again so sorry. Thanks again though everyone for your wonderful reviews! They keep this story alive! Anyway please enjoy and review the latest chapter I'm really glad i managed to get it up quicker than the last few I hope you all like it! **

" Alice …what the…" my brother said a little flabbergasted, obviously my outfit surprised, perfect

"Alice …what the…" my brother said a little flabbergasted, obviously my outfit surprised him, perfect.

"You like it?" I asked doing a twirl.

"Uh..." he said, Carlisle merely sighed.

"Nurse Alice at your service" I said doing a salute. I had a vision of Bella being sick this morning and decided to run out and get a nurses outfit, if I was going to help take care of my new sister why not look the part? Although it may just be a tad too low to be consider an official nurses outfit, oh well.

"Alice …you do realize no real nurse actually wears something like that" Carlisle said.

"So? This is more fun"

They both sighed, how boring they can be some times.

"Wait if your back then were is Jasper?" Edward asked.

"He-" I was cutoff by a pair of strong arms lifting me over head and before I knew I what was going on being laid down on something soft while something else attacked my lips. It didn't take me long to realize the thing was Jasper's lips and I was laying on my bed, I could never misinterpret the feeling he sent throughout my whole body when we kissed, he didn't have to use his powers for that one.

"Jasper…not now" I managed to choke out, ugh how badly I did not want to say that, nothing would make me happier than to have Jasper ravish me like always does, but Bella needed me.

He pulled away for a second to look in me the eyes, his full of desire and lust. It didn't take long for the desire that I too felt for him to be completely doubled over, which I didn't even think was possible with how strong it was, I knew this was his doing now.

"Jasper…no" I said reluctantly standing up, he looked at me again his eyes hungry for me, I am so glad I can't blush.

"You can't expect me to behave when you're wearing something like that"

"This is exactly why you couldn't come shopping with me" I sighed "I had a vision about what would happen if you came, first off we wouldn't even be home yet and you would have forced your way into every dressing room with me"

"You make it sound like a bad thing" he said with a smirk, god I loved that look.

"Maybe if we were humans, but you know how you get when we make love, sure I can handle it just fine, well actually I love it but the walls of the dressing room are another story"

"So what's a few broken walls? No one would know it was us and its not like we haven't broken things, we lost count of how many beds we've been through after our first month being married"

"I know and normally I wouldn't care but when I saw the mall collapse within itself I had to put my foot down I love that mall Jasper"

"Wow an entire mall? Imagine what Emmett would say, we'd put those houses he brought down to shame" he said with a proud smirk.

"…If it was any other building I would have said lets go for it, but not the mall"

He got up from the bed and walked over to me with that sexy smirk on his face that I loved so much and wrapped his arms around me tightly. It's a good thing I'm not human and that he was holding me, surely I would have collapsed, I was puddy in his arms now.

"Lets make a date then" he told me leaning his forehead against mine, boring into my eyes and I got lost in his, I couldn't even remember where I was or who I was for that matter all I could think of was Jasper.

Before I could say anything he crushed his lips against mine, which I earnestly kissed back, nothing could compare to this feeling.

He laid me down gently on the bed and kissed me everywhere, my lips, my cheeks, my forehead, the hollow behind my ear, when he nipped my earlobe I couldn't hold back to the moan that escape. I felt him smirk against my skin, proud that only he had this effect on me.

"Alright that's enough you two" Edward said as he barged into our room.

I heard Jasper hiss angrily.

"Not now Edward as you can see were a little busy"

"Normally I wouldn't care but this is important I need to speak with Alice about Bella"

Bella? Oh yeah, Bella my sister, she was sick.

"…Just give us a little time, an hour at most" Jasper said. I had a quick vision showing that we would need much more than an hour if we continued.

"Ugh… Alice please" Edward said holding his head, obviously seeing my vision as well.

"Sorry" I giggled.

I pulled Jasper down so I could whisper in his ear though I knew Edward, and probably everyone else, could hear me.

"Don't worry Jasper, I didn't just go shopping with Bella in mind, there's a reason I took so long" I said seductively.

Before I could blink his lips crashed against mine, more earnest than before. I attacked his lips with mine own I couldn't suppress my desire for him anymore, whether he was manipulating that feeling or not I didn't care, I just needed him.

Much to my disappointment, his body suddenly left mine and I heard a loud crash.

I sat up to see Jasper on the ground against the wall a dent in it outlining his body.

Edward wrapped his arm around my wrist and dragged me from the room.

"Jeez Edward you could have just yelled or something, you didn't have to throw him against the wall" I whined as he dragged me.

"It was the only way trust me and I couldn't handle either of your thoughts anymore" he said annoyed.

I suddenly felt another iron grip lock itself around my other arm and I was twirled into something. I realized it was Jasper when he wrapped his arms around me and held me to his chest tightly.

"Mine…" he hissed to Edward.

"I just need to borrow her then you can have her back"

I was a little surprised at Jasper's reaction, I guess he just missed me I was gone awhile, aw my poor Jazzy.

"Jazz its fine besides I do want to check up on Bella" I said kissing his cheek.

"Once she falls asleep your mine, don't think you'll be able to get away from me this time" he whispered in my ear. His words sent chills through my body and I suddenly hoped Bella was already snoozing.

He kissed me gently, sighed, and then went back to our room.

"Can we please go now?"

"Fine" I said rolling my eyes.

As we made our way back up to Bella, we passed Esme sitting on the couch, her eyes closed in frustration.

"That better not have been my wall…" she warned.

"Uh…sorry mom" Edward said.

"…Technically it's our wall since its Jasper and mine's room" I said.

She just looked down and pinched the bridge of her nose in annoyance while heavily sighing, Edward and I quickly made our way up the stairs.

"Finally" he said, once we were alone "Now talk"

"There really isn't anything for me to tell you Edward, if I had seen something important I would have called you" I said honestly.

"So you haven't seen her well yet?" he asked, I could hear him try and cover up the pain in his voice.

I shook my head, not hiding the sadness that was also on my face, I didn't like to see Bella sick.

Edward held his head as a look of pain, worry, sadness, and fear swept across his face all at once.

"I don't know what to do…" he whispered, from his tone I thought that he just might cry, even though he couldn't, he sounded like he needed to though.

"You need to come with me son" Carlisle said, suddenly appearing at our sides.

"I can't leave her Carlisle" He said

"I know Edward and I'm sorry but if you want her to get better you must

I don't know that I can do this on my own" he said. Well this was new Carlisle didn't usually doubt his medical abilities I guess this was more serious than I originally thought.

"Look Edward just go I'll look after Bella" I said trying to reassure him.

"I don't know Alice..." he said, it was barely a whisper. I could only imagine what he was feeling right now, having to see the love of your life sick must be tough, having to leave them while they were like that must be even worse.

"Look I'm not wearing this outfit for my health, I knew I was going to have to look after her so I figured I'd come prepared"

"If you knew you were going have to look after her why didn't you tell me?"

"Because what would be the point in that? If I told you about it you would just dreading the time until you had to leave instead of making her feel better" He couldn't argue with me there and he didn't, we both know that if I told him he just would have moped around Bella until he had to leave, then that would have made Bella worry and he wouldn't tell her why he was acting that way, which would have upset her even more, which in turn would have made him upset because he was making her upset, wow these two are really confusing yet easy to read.

"But... What if something happens?" he eventually started to argue, still desperate to stay behind.

"Uh hello if something happens I'll know before it happens" I said tapping my temple.

"Maybe we should just bring her with us"

I responded to his suggestion by playing the argument that would ensue if he even suggested the idea to Bella, to which he only sighed to, knowing that that would happen even if I hadn't shown him my vision.

I didn't blame Bella for hating hospitals, something about the place really scares me and freaks me out. The long gowns the patients have to wear, the smell of medical supplies, the way the rooms are setup with simply just a bed and maybe a TV. I shuddered at these thoughts, I realized though that whatever caused me to be so afraid of hospitals probably has to do with whatever happened to me when I was at the asylum while I was alive. Sometimes I was glad I didn't remember my past life; it couldn't have been all that great especially since Jasper wasn't there.

He looked at me for a moment but I could tell he was more so debating with himself about whether or not he could actually leave.

"...You better call me the second you have any visions" were his last words before he went back to Bella.

Edward and I went back to their room while Carlisle went to wait outside, I stayed outside to give them their privacy but I could still hear everything that was happening in the room.

"I love you…so much" he said while kissing her all over.

"I love you too Edward…more than anything" she whispered while kissing him back.

Ugh, this was really not something I care not to listen too.

A few minutes later, they had stopped muttering 'I love you' and were simply kissing and hugging.

A few more minutes later, they were still going at it.

After ten minutes I decided to take matters into my own hands, it was time I got a little revenge on Edward for prying me away from my Jazzy before.

I barged in and before he could turn around, I grabbed Edward by the back of his shirt and tossed him to the ground, I decided against the wall we had already ruined one anyway.

"Sorry but I thought you deserved a taste of your own medicine" I told him.

He merely sighed and went back over to Bella. He gave her one last long gentle kiss, for a minute I thought she might suffocate it was so long.

"I love you Bella if you need anything, anything at all call I have my cell with me"

"I know Edward I'll be fine Alice is here, everything will be fine" she said stroking his cheek gently trying to soothe him, well this was awkward I really did not like to be present for these intimate moments between my brother and sister.

He took the hand she was using to caress his cheek and gently kissed her palm before kissing her again lightly on the lips.

Then finally, he left, walking backward out the door mind you, never dropping his gaze on her.

"Finally" I said shutting the door and locking it once he was gone, I don't know why I did it's not like a locked door could keep Edward from Bell, actually anyone in this house for that matter.

I turned around to see Bella giggling while looking at me.

"Alice whatever are you wearing?" she giggled.

"That's Nurse Alice" I corrected while walking over to her "At your service" I said with another salute.

"Um Alice I don't think nurses salute"

"Oh well" I shrugged and she giggled again.

Once she had stopped laughing she looked down at the sheets, I could tell that Edward leaving was just as hard on her as well; she just tried not to show it.

"Here" I said handing her cell. She took it with a puzzled looked but once it vibrated in her hand it all clicked.

"They barely made out of the driveway" I said as she read his text I didn't need to look at it to know what it said.

'I'm so sorry I had to leave how are? Are you alright? Is Alice taking care of you? What's she doing? Do you need anything? I love you' it read.

I rolled my eyes at it; Edward worried more than an overprotective mother whose child had been born without immunities.

"He really needs to relax" I said but Bella didn't respond she just texted him back with a wide yet weak smile on her face.

It was only as I watched her text him did I begin to understand, she could barely press the buttons she was so weak, and I'm sure she was in a descent amount of pain.

I was use to the fact that humans were extremely weak in comparison to us, but I had never been around someone this weak and fragile, more so I had never been in love with someone like this.

I met Jasper when he was a vampire I never had to worry about him getting hurt or sick; the mere thought of it seemed silly. But then I thought about it, what if it was Jasper sitting here barely able to move and in pain, it tore my heart to shreds just to think about it.

I started to feel bad about how I was reacting toward Edward's behavior; I now know I would have been just as bad if not if this was Jasper.

"…How are you feeling?" I asked, trying to be abit more sympathetic.

She shrugged and very weak shrug.

"I've been better" she merely whispered. Poor Bella, my visions did no justice to her actually condition, I didn't realize it was this bad.

"Can I get you anything?"

She shook her head.

"I'm alright"

"Bella…if your feeling up to I was hoping I could talk to about something" I realized that this would be my only chance to talk to her in private.

"…Sure" she whispered nervously.

"Well…this may sound a little weird but…who was in your room last night?" I suddenly realized this wasn't a little weird, it was really weird.

"Uh…" she said blushing "Edward and me why?"

"Are you sure it was just you two? The whole night?"

"I guess I was asleep for most of it why?"

"Don't freak alright I'm sure it was just nothing…but…you kind of disappeared"

"Disappeared?"

"From my visions like when you hang out with the wolves"

A look of fear of panic spread across her face.

"Don't worry it was only like a second! Before I could even tell anyone you were back" I reassured her, she seemed calm down a bit.

"I'm sure it was just me" I lied. I knew it wasn't me but I didn't want to freak her out while she was like this, I would have to figure this out on my own.

"Oh right your present!" I said remembering and trying to change the subject.

"…Present?" she said angrily, at least her mind was focused on something else.

"Don't worry you'll like it I'll be back in a jiffy" I ran out of her room and was back with a bag in under second.

She rolled her eyes and took the bag.

Her anger seemed to disappear when she took out the blue sweats I bought her while shopping.

"You didn't think I was just shopping for myself did ya?" I said with a smile.

"Alice there so…soft" she said.

"Yup I thought you might want something comfortable to wear until you get better and blue is Edward's favorite color on you" I said with a smile.

She weakly put her arms around me.

"Thank you Alice"

"No thanks necessary but don't think you'll be wearing sweats a lot after you better" I warned while hugging her back.

I shocked by how cold her body was.

She seemed eager to change but when she got up she started to wobble so I helped her over to the bathroom, how awful she could barely walk.

"Do you need help changing?" I asked, it wasn't really something I wanted to do but if she needed me I'd do it.

"Um…no I think I can manage" she said blushing; I must admit I was relieved she said no.

I waited outside the bathroom while she changed when a vision hit me, I sighed at what was about to happen. I did see something peculiar in it though, something I would have to check one it was over.

"Alice there so cozy thank you and I must admit they look great" she said coming out of the bathroom.

"You didn't think I walked around sweats that didn't look right did you? Who do you think I am?"

She giggled again and this time I joined her.

"Blue really is your color" I told her.

Before she could respond she grabbed her stomach and put her hand over her mouth, here it comes.

She ran with strength I didn't she had back to the bathroom and got sick. A disgusting sight really but I felt horrible that this was happening to her; I held her hair back until she was done.

When she was done she was panting trying to regain her composure.

"S-sorry" Bella muttered.

"Don't be its fine" I said only half listening; I had seen what I was looking for from my vision.

A small part of Bella's side was sticking out of the sweats, except her skin was completely red.

"Bella…if your feeling up to it and don't mind…could you pick your shirt up a bit?" I realized that this was an awkward question to ask but I kept my tone serious.

She nodded slightly and lifted her shirt to just below her breasts.

Her entire waist, front, back, and sides were completely red.

"…Measles" I muttered, recognizing the rash.

Her look of fear from earlier returned to her face, I quickly wrapped my arms around her trying to reassure her it'd be okay, but even I was a little scared now.

"W-what's wrong with me Alice?" she sobbed against my chest.

"I don't know Bella but I promise you were going to find out your going to be okay" I told her.

She didn't say anything more she just sobbed silently. This was really bad though I didn't know if I should tell anyone about her measles, Edward was literally going to have a heart attack. He had had her wrapped up so tight that no one must have ever gotten the chance to see it.

I picked Bella up, still crying a little but slowly calming down, and gently placed her back in bed. I picked up her cell phone and put it on speaker for her before placing it back down on the bed as Edward called.

"Bella? What's wrong? Are you alright?" he said, his voice sounded panicked, he must've known something was wrong.

"Y-yes Edward I'm fine" she choked through her sobs.

"Why are you crying? Please Bella don't lie to me"

She started to cry more again, I could tell how upset she was. She wasn't just afraid for her own life, she was afraid for Edward's life as well because she knew what he would do if she didn't pull through.

"Please Bella" he begged, there was so much pain in his voice.

"Edward…she has the measles" I told him for her.

There was such dead silence on the other end of the phone that I wasn't sure if the call was still connected until I pressed a button.

"I'll be right there" he choked out right before the line went dead.

Bell rolled over and curled herself into a ball as she wept the last of her tears. I slowly rubbed up and down her arm trying to let her know she'd be okay, not too long after her head hit the pillow thought did she fall asleep

I sighed; the sleep would do her some good.

I exited the room quietly and decided to go look for Jasper. After seeing Bella so ill and Edward so torn I was suddenly very grateful I would never have to worry about that with him, I could never stand it if something happened to my Jazzy.

As I skipped down the halls, I saw what Edward had been both waiting for and fearing the entire day.

Bella, laying weak, crippled and unconscious in a hospital bed with tubes and wires connected to her everywhere, a heart monitor in the corner beeping slowly, and become slower.

And Edward standing over her clutching her to his chest, as the heart monitor finally came to one last beep before flat lining; he did the impossible and slowly began to cry.

**Jeez the ending to this chapter even made me sad and i know how the whole story ends lol. Again sorry about any grammar errors or missing words, inpsiration hit me in the middle of the night and i ended up writing half of this chapter on my ipod touch, and if anyone has ever sent text message on a iphone well imagine typing like that foor a good hour or so.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Ugh...I am so sorry i havent updated in awhile, I wont lie I really didn't enjoy writing this chapter this much I only wrote it because the story wouldn't have made sense without it anyway i apologize for the delay and that its so short. I'll try to have the next one up quicker I promise again sorry! **

**Anyway the next thing im writing is very important which is why im writing it over here and in caps: THIS CHAPTER IS NOT A CONTINUATION, THIS TAKES PLACE AS THE SAME TIME AS CHAPTER 7, IT SHOWS WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN EDWARD AND CARLISLE WHILE THEY WERE AT THE HOSPITAL. I hope everyone read that otherwise they will be very confused, if you are though feel free to message me I am happy to answer any questions. **

**On another note, please keep in mind while reading this that I made all of it up in my head and I realize in medical terms it may or may not make sense, I don't know and I'm not a doctor. I'm sorry if anyone whose serious about medical stuff gets upset but I seriously just made it all up.**

**Please let me know what you think of this chapter, I really didn't like it that much but I'm curious as to what others think, don't worry if you think it sucks you can tell me. But as always please enjoy and review.**

Why? Why did this have to happen? Why did my Bella have to become ill? But most of all, why did I have to be dragged away from her in her time of need? Why did I have to go to medical school? Why did I need to be the only one with the knowledge and experience? Perhaps I was being punished, yes that would sound right, Lord knows I deserve it.

All these thoughts went through my mind as Carlisle raced down the road toward the hospital. I don't know how fast he was going and it didn't matter, no matter how fast he was going it still felt like we were barely inching down the road.

"I'm so sorry Edward" he told me for the thousandth time, though I did not respond. Deep down I knew Carlisle was right, that this was no normal illness, that he would need help if Bella was ever going to get better, but still why me?

While my head was rather preoccupied with all the things going through it I still could not stop thinking about my Bella. Her pale skin which was now sickly pale due the sickness though none the less still more beautiful than anything, her warm body which had now become cold, and her beautiful chocolate brown eyes had a much darker chocolate brown though still just as breath taking.

I had sent Bella text before with one too many questions but I needed answers.

'I am the same but I am alright. Alice is just taking care of me and no I don't need anything. I love you too' she replied.

As much as I wanted to I decided I should stop texting Bella, she needed to rest and-

"Edward?" Carlisle said confused. I looked around to see we were in the parking garage of the hospital and he was outside of the car waiting for me. I sighed realizing that if I kept texting her I would not be able to focus on the task at hand just like I was unable to focus on our surroundings.

We made are way to Carlisle's office were he pulled out a microscope and her vials of blood.

"Will you be okay?" he asked concerned.

"Trust me ill be fine" I said with all confidence.

After being without Bella for such a long time I had with no doubt I could resist the call of her blood. The pain of leaving her made the burn in my throat non existent; my body did everything it could to prevent that tragic pain of her absence from happening again.

He spilled a small amount on to a slide and put it under the microscope.

"My goodness…" he said.

"What?" I croaked out, I could all feel myself starting to shake slightly at what he saw, and vampires don't normally shake.

"Come…" he said getting up.

I went over to the microscope and if I could vomit at the sight I saw I would have.

Bella's blood was covered in tiny bacteria and germs, it was a repulsive sight. And being a vampire I could what humans never noticed. I could see the outline and slight movement of the germs as they did their work infecting her. I could even see few white blood cells that happened to sucked into the mess, I watch as they helplessly tried to stop the germs only to be crushed by the overwhelming number of them, what I would give to be on the battlefield.

"Edward I never seen so many different types of germs all at once and look how fast their all multiplying"

I did see it, again something else that a human could never see but none the less I saw how the tiny bacteria multiplied itself, I again wanted to hurl.

"…What I can we do?" I all but whispered.

"I don't know…even if we gave her a cure for one disease the others are still multiplying to fast, some of those illnesses still don't have a full cure yet"

"What if we gave her more than one cure at once…?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"Her body could never handle it, no human could" he told me.

I sighed rubbing my temples in frustration and worry, what were we going to do?

"Do you have any idea how this could have happened Edward?"

"Not the slightest"

"Do you remember anything out of the ordinary happening recently?"

"N-" Before I could answer I remembered the strange events that occurred this morning in Bella's room.

"Well…" I started "This morning in Bella's room there was a very faint but unfamiliar scent it didn't smell like a person though, more like a detergent or maybe a perfume and…"

"…And?"

"She had the smallest cut on her neck"

"Cut? Do you think it could have been infected?"

"No it was much too small it wasn't even a cut really it was a dot but I could tell it was a scab"

"Interesting…" he said, while thinking over this new information.

"Carlisle that hardly matters now what matters is that we must find a way to cure Bella"

He didn't say anything, he was too deep in thought but then suddenly he gazed up to me, serious and stern.

"No…" I said reading his face.

"Edward-"

"No" I said again harshly before he could finish.

"We may not have another choice son…"

"Carlisle I already agreed to change her, but not yet I won't let this illness claim her"

"Edward your being irrational no one saw this coming and Bella will understand and probably be more than willing" he said. He was right; she probably would be more than willing despite our earlier agreement.

That's the one thing I will never understand about Bella in our soon eternity together. Her desire to be damned and become a monster as soon as possible.

"Look…I made her a promise that we would do something before she was changed and I plan to do it, its just we agreed to do it after the wedding" Oh how grateful I am I can't blush.

"I see…" Carlisle said, I could tell by his tone he did for the most but was curious about exactly what 'it' is, though he would never invade our privacy and ask.

"Plus I want her to have a human wedding" I added quickly.

I felt horrible as I told my father these lies, yes these were things that I was taking into consideration but part of it was that _I _wasn't ready to turn Bella yet. I wasn't ready to give up her blush, her heartbeat, her wonderful scent, all these things I had grown to love about her. Yes I was eager to finally have her as my official mate and spend forever with her but I just wasn't quite ready. I was preparing myself for the date that she would be changed enjoying all the wonderful little human things about her so I would be ready when the time came, but now was not the time.

But most of all was that during our entire relationship Bella had never asked me for anything. Yes occasionally I would get her something, but she never wanted any of it not to mention she hated getting gifts. She had no idea that I had a desire to spoil her worst than a parent to a first born child, to get her everything I possibly could. Yet every time I asked she said there was nothing she wanted except me, which I more than willingly gave her.

The problem was now, she wanted me in a different type of way, one that I was opposed only out of fear of hurting her, possibly even killing her, I shuddered at that thought.

Though I could never deny the fact that I wanted her too, how could I not? Just look at her, she makes Helen of Troy look like the wicked witch of the west. One could see how complicated my situation was.

Still, I promised Bella we would at least try, and I wanted to be able to give her the one thing she asked me for, before her change.

I knew how horrible I was being gambling with my Bella's life like this, but I just couldn't do it not yet, there has to be some way.

"Very well" Carlisle sighed "But like I said I've never seen something like this before, if it comes down to it you may have too"

I didn't respond, knowing the truth to his words. If there was truly no other way to for her to live I would change her without I a thought, I wasn't about to let Bella die because of my selfishness and her desire.

"And if you don't _I_ will your not the only one who loves her" he warned. His words caught me off guard, but they were nothing I was worried about, I would bite her before it came too close.

I held my head while sitting at the desk, to any human I probably looked like I was suffering a terrible headache, and if I was human I had no doubt I would be.

Suddenly while I was sitting there, a horrible pain shot through me, it felt like someone took a rusty dagger to my dead heart. It was an odd type of pain, purely emotional yet it could be mistaking for physical.

However, I was familiar with this pain and I knew what it meant, It was a warning that something was wrong with Bella, it happened whenever something happened to Bella but we weren't near each other, the worse the pain the worse whatever incident accord to her. I'm sure she felt the same thing when something happened to me however rare that maybe; it was just how close we have become and how much we needed each other.

In one fast movement I took out my cell and dialed Bella's number, I'm sure it even took Carlisle a second to figure out what happened.

As scared and worried as I was, I was grateful she picked up on the first ring.

"Bella? What's wrong? Are you alright?" I said, it was difficult for me to say this at a human speed with how worried I was.

"Y-yes I'm fine Edward" she said, I could tell by her voice she was crying. Why was she crying!? What happened!? Why couldn't I be there to comfort her!?

"Why are you are you crying? Please Bella don't lie to me" I knew she lied to keep me from worrying but it was completely pointless now.

I could hear her starting to cry more on the other end of the phone; it tore my insides to shreds to hear those sobs, why was this happening?

"Please Bella" I begged, I couldn't stand it I needed to know what was wrong with her.

"Edward she has the measles" Alice said for her.

My dead heart dropped a lot further than my stomach when I heard those words. Not another one, there was too many they were spreading too fast who knows how much longer her small body could last.

"I'll be right there" were my last words and I instantly left the hospital.

I didn't bother saying anything to Carlisle, he heard the phone call and knew what was going on he'd understand.

I also didn't bother with a car, I didn't care how fast it was, it wasn't fast enough, besides I think I this called for a run. I knew my legs couldn't carry me fast enough, nothing really could but I didn't trust myself like this behind the wheel, nor in passenger's seat.

Despite their slow speed to me my legs were carrying me faster than every before, I'm sure that I was completely invisible to everyone else with my speed.

I made it home and approached the house to fast for anyone in my family to notice, I quickly made my way over to the door just in time to see Alice's vision.

**Again, sorry about any grammar or spelling errors. **


	9. Chapter 9

**sigh sorry again for the delay I've been really busy lately with work and starting school so i apologize and im also sorry this chapter isnt very long either. Thank you all very much for your wonderful reviews they really are what keep me writing so thank you again. Please let me know what you think of this chapter though, again it was not one of my favorite but i had to write to keep things going and finally get to the twist and all that good stuff lol. I think of it kind of like a bridge chapter, its not that great but the story wouldnt make senes without gets you from part to the next, but thats just me. Anyway, please enjoy and review!**

I awoke, though I wish I hadn't, to the sound of a hissing vampire

I awoke, though I wish I hadn't, to the sound of a hissing vampire.

"When!?" I heard.

"…Edward?" I mumbled, but again I wish I hadn't, my throat ache more with the slight use of my voice, it was really rather irritating to not be able to talk, for once I wish Edward could read my mind.

"Yes my love?" Edward said, suddenly beside me. Even after all this time I was still not use to his ability to just suddenly pop up out of nowhere, I wonder if that would change once I was changed.

I tried to prop myself up, but failed too. I felt as if I had no energy at all, like all I could really manage to do was lay there. If something was about to hit me or fall on me I would not be able to move out of the way I would have to just wait for the pain.

Realizing how weak I was, Edward put his arm under me and helped me up. He cradled me in his arms and I leaned into him as much as I could using some non-existent strength to move closer.

"What is it Bella? What's wrong? What do you need? What can I get you?" Edward asked. His voice was full of worry and panic, it sounded as if he was having difficulty talking…like he had something in his throat…like he was about to cry.

I've never seen Edward looked so hurt; his beautiful topaz eyes were full of pain, my heart ache at the sight of them. His eyes were one of my most favorite things about him; I never wanted to see so much pain in them.

His angel like face was covered in agony, hurt, fear and just about every other emotion that could describe his pain and worry. His body seemed unsteady, like he was trembling maybe even shaking.

"Edward…what's wrong?" I choked out while I weakly reached out for his face, sadly my hand barely made it an inch off the bed, but he saw what I was trying to do and moved it up so my palm was cupping his cheek. I managed to move my fingers slightly to stroke his soft hard cheek while he leaned into my palm.

This is exactly what I was worried about happening, him becoming a complete mess over me. I can't stand this why does this always have to happen? Why must I always hurt the ones I love? I don't want him to worry about me to the point were he's like this.

But then a thought came back to me, the thought of him being the one laying in his bed well I held him up. I would look the same, no, I would look worse. I guess I can understand his reaction, but I wasn't that bad. Yes I have yet another illness and no one knows how or why they are all happening so quickly but I would be okay, it's not like I was going to die from this. Edward and Carlisle would heal me before that happened I would be fine, I just want him to be okay once I get better.

But he wasn't acting _this_ worried before he left, yes I could tell he was concerned, but he was hiding it from me and he was doing his best to make me feel better. Now he was beyond the point of simply being concerned, he was practically crazed with the way he looked. So what happened while he was out to make this occur? He wasn't even making an attempt at hiding it.

"Nothing Bella I'm just worried about you"

"You weren't this worried before"

"You weren't this sick before"

"Edward" I said trying to sound a little more firm, I didn't want to hear his lies.

"…Bella…please" I could tell by his tone, that he was asking, no begging me to not make him tell me what happened.

I sighed a burning sigh; I didn't want to make him any worse so I just nodded. Maybe he could tell him once this was over, but he caught me by surprise when he picked me up from the bed and headed toward the garage with me in his arms. I could tell how carefully he was being while he carried me by his slow pace; he cradled me so close to him almost like I was a newborn.

He got into the back seat of Alice 's Porsche, who was already backing out of the driveway by the time he shut the door. He gently sat me across his lap while holding me close to him in his arms. I managed to move a little so I could lay my head against his rock hard shoulder, it was so comfortable, better than any pillow.

He gently rocked me back and forth while humming my lullaby, stopping every now and then to kiss some part of my face. I was beginning to feel a lot more like a newborn with the way he was treating me, still, I didn't really mind to be honest. I had missed Edward dearly even though he was only gone for a little while; I closed my eyes and just tried to enjoy the moment.

I don't know when or where he got it but I suddenly felt him wrap a blanket around me while still holding me tightly in his arms, when will he learn that he is better than any blanket?

I didn't need to ask where we were going, but the drive to the hospital ended rather quickly thanks to Alice 's insane driving, I was grateful my eyes were closed I'm sure that if I so much as glanced out the window I would have puked all over her car.

And trust me, sick or not, that would not have gone over well with Alice . Normally I would have put up a fight against the hospital, but with Edward like this I decided its probably not a good idea, and I will admit I was sick…

Alice dropped us off at the entrance and Edward proceeded to carry me all the way up to the room at his human pace. I knew he could tell I wasn't asleep, he always could, probably because I wasn't mumbling embarrassing things, but neither he nor Alice had said anything the entire ride and he was still silent as he walked.

I peaked one eye open to look at him and almost regretted it, Edward was staring straight ahead with a look on his face as if he just saw someone murder his entire family. I don't understand, what happened to cause him this much pain? Was it really that difficult for him to see me like this? I would get better why couldn't he see that?

We eventually made it to the room. Carlisle was already there along all this medical equipment.

"Is all this really necessary?" I managed to ask looking at it all, I knew he probably saw me peak before so it was pointless to keep them closed.

"Yes" Carlisle and Edward and answered firmly in sync.

I sighed a burning sigh as Edward laid me down and tucked me in, but even then his arms refused to leave me as he climbed in and held me even tighter to him, but still not to tight. I leaned against Edward's perfect granite hard chest and Carlisle proceeded to hook me up to all the devices, I didn't any pain or if there was suppose to be any, I was too focused on Edward, who was still focused on what ever occurred before.

"If you feel worse or need something please ask" Carlisle said before leaving, he was such a good man and was going to make a wonderful father to me.

I really hated hospitals, they reminded too much of the incident with James, whose mate we only managed to just recently kill. I never thought I'd be relieved over someone's death, but I couldn't help it knowing Edward and the Cullen's were truly safe…at least I hoped.

I glanced at Edward again only to see him focusing intently on the floor with the same look on his face as before. I was about to start questioning him again when my cell phone suddenly rang.

"Hello?" Edward said, answering it for me. His acting abilities never ceased to amaze, he sounded as if nothing had ever happened at all, like everything was perfectly fine,

"Bella?" I heard a man say.

"No Charlie its Edward" oh wonderful, he was just the person I needed calling in the midst of this, it was bad enough Edward and the family was freaking out over me, now we get to have Charlie too, and when he tells Renee! Ugh!

"Oh…" Charlie said disapprovingly, I really wish he'd accept Edward, you think he'd realize that after we told him about the proposal Edward wasn't going anywhere so he should just get use to him.

"Why are you answering Bella's phone? Where is she?" Charlie asked, luckily the hospital and this room was quiet enough for me to hear this whole thing.

"It's just like the note says Charlie" Note? What note?

"Well still I wanted to check in with her and why doesn't she have her phone with her?"

" Alice 's rule, she didn't want any interruptions during there shopping spree" what in the world was he talking about?

"Hmph..." I heard Charlie grunt; I knew he would not be acting like this if it was any of the other Cullen's on the phone.

"Well tell her to give me a call when she gets in" Charlie said.

"Ill see if I can you know how Alice is she'll probably have to carry Bella in"

"Well then have Alice call at least I just want to make sure she's alright"

"I assure you she is and will be" he is def the world's greatest liar, much better than Holden Caufield, only a few of us could tell when he was doing it.

"Bye then" Charlie said hanging up.

Edward let out a sigh and before I could even ask began explaining the situation.

"Alice decided it would be less stressful for both of you if he didn't know about this. She left him a note saying she kidnapped you for a shopping spree and slumber party" his voice had gone back to that of someone who recently lost a family member. Still I would have to thank Alice , again she was right and had anyone else written a note about my absence I knew there would have been a lot more questioning.

"Edward…" I croaked. I couldn't take this any longer I needed to know what ever it was that had happened to make him like this, I needed to know so I could comfort him and make him feel better as best I could, I cant stand to see him like this.

He squeezed me in response as if he just didn't want to use his voice.

"Please just te-" before I could finish Edward suddenly left the bed and was near the open window, I didn't even see him move.

I looked over at Edward as he looked out the window, his topaz eyes that were so sad and hurt a moment ago had suddenly turned the darkest black and were filled with anger and rage.

"Edward…?"

I heard a growl rip through his chest.

"Stay here" he growled with that he left through the window in a fit of rage.

**Again, sorry about any grammar or spelling issues.**


	10. Author's note

**Okay sorry guys this isn't a new chapter, I'm just putting this note up to clear up some confusion that seems to be going on.**

**At the end of chapter 7 Alice had a vision of Bella dead in the hospital with Edward holding her and crying. Chapter 8 takes place at the same time as chapter 7, except it shows what happens between Edward and Carlisle when they go to the hospital. Edward returns home at the same time that Alice has the vision of Bella being dead in the hospital with him in chpater 7, so he sees the vision with her. I hope this clears up some confusion and answers your questions. If you guys are still unsure about anything just let me know I'm more than happy to answer any questions.**


	11. Chapter 10

**okay hey guys first off i just wanna apologize for taking so long with this chapter, i've been super busy i started school, applying to colleges, looking at colleges, working, tryig to do hw, trying to study for the SATs, and learning how to drive, i think thats everthing. Anyway im really sry for the delay and that its so short...and not that good in my opinon. Well as always please enjoy and review!**

It was faint but it was there, even if it was for only a half a second, my nose never lies. The vile scent of my kind…vampire. His scent was faint and if I hadn't been inhaling I probably would have missed, but I knew he was there now, there was no escape for him.

I leapt from Bella's bed, carefully enough so she didn't move but quickly enough that I caught another whiff of the bastard's scent. There was something out there with him…another scent…a familiar one.

It difficult to try and focus while my body was so full rage, how dare someone of my kind come so close to Bella while she's like this!? I don't care if he's just passing by, if they even so much as think about touching Bella Hell will seem like a paradise to them compared to what I'll do.

I paused for a moment, trying to see if I could hear any unfamiliar thoughts, none came. However, his already weak scent was fading at a fast rate, he was running. Why though? Yes I had just sworn to kill him, but how could he know that? It's not very common for a vampire to run in the face of another vampire. Perhaps he knew us? No I would have recognized his scent. Still at the rate his scent was fading he was running scared. Scared, another uncommon thing for a vampire, perhaps it's because my whole family is here. Still…it seemed odd.

"Stay here" I growled to Bella, not like she could really go anywhere though.

I leapt from the window and darted to wards the scent, obviously who ever this was knew I was coming as they increased their speed. I didn't care though; I would hunt them down and find exactly what the hell was going on.

I surprised at just how fast this vampire was, normally I should have caught up to them by now, no vampire could run this fast unless they were a…a newborn? It's new born? It has to be, I'm one of the fastest of my kind but he still seemed to keeping some distance between us. It mattered not though I would catch him.

I pushed myself to run faster than even I thought was possible, I could barely see where I was going, I heard a few cracks meaning I probably ran through a few trees not that it mattered.

Finally I saw a glimpse of my culprit's back, my feet were barely touching the ground now, I was truly flying through the forest.

As I got closer the strange, familiar scent became stronger, and finally figured out what it was, detergent with some kind of perfume. It was the exact same scent that I smelled earlier in Bella's room. Meaning he was in Bella's room, that was his first mistake, the one that would bring his life to an end.

With a loud crash I slammed into my culprits back sending us tumbling to the ground. I caught a glimpse of something large and furry in his hands, it made a loud thud when it hit the ground but it mattered not what it was, I'd deal with it later. We wrestled on the ground for some time, tumbling down a nearby hill. I was doing my best to get the upper hand but he was making good use of his newborn strength, he was a surprisingly skilled fighter.

I managed to pin him to the ground and finally get a look at his face. It was full of anger and fear at the same time, his red eyes shone with hatred, I was right he was a newborn. He had long black hair, long enough to just about reach above his shoulders but still too short to be able to tie behind his head. It seemed to get in the way as we fought. He was somewhat old, for a vampire at least, he appeared to be around 35 when he was turned. Oddly enough, he was dressed as if he were a doctor, complete with the long white lab coat, which was now ruined from our battle.

I did not recognize him at all, nor have I ever heard Carlisle mention such a vampire to me. So who was he? What had he done? And most of all, what the hell was he doing in Bella's room?

"Who are you and what hell did you do to Bella!?" I hissed.

There was a loud crack through the forest as he punched me in my face, leaving no mark. I returned the favor by grabbing his arm and biting down on it as hard as I could, pouring as much of my venom on him as I could, I wanted to leave a mark.

He snarled in anger and possibly pain as the venom seeped under his hard skin. He managed to get out from under me and grabbed me by the ankle, throwing me into a tree, completely knocking it over, in one quick movement. I was completely fine; the tree was the one who was really been hurt.

He glared at me as I stood up, me returning the gaze, obviously our feelings were mutual.

"You can't win this ill hunt you down until I find out everything" I hissed.

"It doesn't matter there's nothing left for me anyway" he said, his voice dripping with acid. I guess he didn't like what he was, but what did it have to do with my Bella?

I noticed an irritating noise from when I had first gotten close to him growing louder, music? Where was music coming from?

I looked around curiously to find it source only to see him chuckling, which is when I figured it was coming from him. It was his thoughts; he was blocking me out…

"You're blocking me…" I said.

"Obviously"

"How do you know?"

"I know a lot of things about you Edward, more than you think"

My name too? What else could this stranger know?

"Tell me what you did to Bella" I demanded.

"Why should I?"

"Because I'll kill you if you don't"

"Please as if that really matters, in this life is death really something to be feared? I don't think so I think it should be something we all seek to be free of this horrible existence"

He really hated what he was; perhaps I would have gotten along with his views if I met him before Bella. He was right, death didn't really matter when your existence was already hell and you had nothing to live for. But now I have something to live for and there's no way ill let anyone take her away from me.

"Just tell me what wrong with her!" I yelled, grabbing him by the throat and pinning him against a tree.

"Why should I? There's nothing you can do to make me talk" he said.

I punched him hard in the ribs, hearing the cracks of them as they broke.

"Agh!" he yelled in pain, I smirked his response.

He took a few unneeded breaths and then chuckled, which I'm sure also hurt him because I saw him wince in pain as he did.

"No matter…" he mumbled "They'll heal quickly, no amount of physical pain you cause me can make me talk" he said.

I tried to probe harder into his mind, seeking for any kind of clues as to what the hell was going on, more music was all I found.

"Dam you!" I yelled, throwing him to the ground, cracking it where he landed.

The bastard began to laugh at the frustration that growing in me.

In a fit of anger I started kicking him as hard as I could while he lay on the ground. He didn't bother to fight back he just laid there and took it, laughing every now and then. I heard bones break and the earth shudder beneath me as I stomped on him. Any human would be dead by now and if I kept this he just might die as well.

"Oh no…" he suddenly mumbled, during my attack. I was surprised I heard him I was so lost with rage, perhaps he was nearing his end and was realizing it. He suddenly cared greatly about his life as he grabbed my foot as it was about to make contact with him again and tossed me aside. I guess I hadn't been hurting him as much as I hoped, then again shouldn't be surprised he is a newborn vampire after all, he'll be completely healed well before dawn.

He began to frantically make his way up the hill we had stumbled down when I attacked him earlier, did he really think he could run? I quickly followed him to the top to discover he wasn't trying to run at all. It wasn't his life he was worried about when he spoke before; he had heard the whimpering of some hurt creature up on the hill. I however was too far gone to hear it earlier; he was the cause of all my poor Bella's suffering after all.

I looked over with him to see the creature on the ground, it was large and furry, the source of the detergent smell, the thing he had been carrying earlier. I stood in shock as I realized what it was and saw a large, rustic colored wolf whimper and slowly stand up.

"Jacob…" I muttered.

**Again sry aboout spelling/grammar errors. Btw i know my last chapters have been pretty short, mainly because i think itll be too long if i stop it were i originally plan. So i was woderig would guy prefer if i wrote longer chapters? Please keep in min though that it would take me longer toupload which i aologize for, sry im just really busy anyway please let me know.**


	12. Chapter 11

**Wow okay i am really sorry i took so long with this chapter, but it is a very important chapter and i wanted to make sure it came out okay. But dont worry guys i promise i wont abandon this story i will see it to the end, so if i disappear for awhile it just means im trying to get the chapter as best as i can. Anyway i really hope you all enjoy this chapter.As always enjoy and review.**

As if my day could get any worse, the brown russet wolf that was Jacob Black slowly stood before me

As if my day could get any worse, the brown russet wolf that was Jacob Black slowly stood before me. He seemed like could barely stand up as his leg trembled and his body shuddered. The look in his eyes surprised me, he looked dazed and confused, he kept blinking his eyes and shaking his as he tried gain focus.

"Jacob…" I muttered, His head shot as he looked over at me, he looked shocked to see me.

"_Edward?"_ he thought, his thoughts sounded just as confused as his face look.

"Shit" I heard, suddenly remembering the mysterious vampire.

Before I could turn my head he had launched himself at Jacob. They rolled on the ground a few times before he completely constricted himself around Jacob like a snaked would its prey. He grabbed Jacob's mouth and stared deeply into his eyes, as if he was trying to hypnotize him. Jacob was obviously weak from whatever happened to him, I knew he was a much better fighter than this. He had taken out numerous newborns in the attack that day, so why was he having so much difficulty with this one?

I ran towards them but before I could reach them the look in the vampire's eyes caused me to freeze. I don't know exactly how to describe it but that look in his eyes made my perfect vision go cloudy and my wide mind hazy. Before I could fully snap back into reality a large wolf was on top of me, knocking me to the ground. Jacob was baring his large white teeth at me and growling loudly in this throat.

He glared at me angrily with eyes that were not his own.

"Jacob…" I whispered confused which only made him snarl loudly at me.

What in the world was his doing? Did truly hate me so? Did the invitation anger him so much it turned him into someone he's not?

No, Jacob hated me and would kill me if, however, it wasn't for Bella. For some strange reason that girl actually loved me back and he knew how much I meant to her and what it would do to her if he killed me, so why was he about to rip my throat out?

Before I could react, I heard the snap of two fingers and then he was off of me.

As I stood I saw Jacob sitting next to the bastard from before, they looked like a master and his pet. The anger and hatred in Jacob's eyes has disappeared but they were still not his own. They were blank and dead as he off at nothing, completely motionless.

"Jacob…what are you doing?" I said shocked and confused, if he truly hated me, would he really go as far as to siding with another vampire so he could kill me?

"Jacob…so that's his name" the vampire said.

"Your not the only who can get into other people's head boy" the vampire said, petting Jacob's still form.

"But unlike you, I can get inside and stay there and ultimately control them" he said.

Instantly my mind became hazy and my thoughts unclear as my whole head filled with pain. I held my head as I tried to hold my ground and keep control.

The pain was bad but tolerable, nothing compared to the pain he caused me by harming my Bella. It was kind of like having a really bad headache, something I had not experienced for over a century. Pain in general was really something I was not use to dealing; it's not easy to cause a vampire pain aside from the burn in our throats.

It had hurt most when it first hit but now I barely noticed it, I was too filled with anger for what he had done. I dropped my hands from my head as I clenched them into fists and shot him my death glare. It was kind of like having a really bad headache, something I had not experienced for over a century.

"It seems I can only control one of super natural creatures at a time though" he said frustrated.

"Humans on the other are weak minded and I can easily control over a hundred of them at once, not that they would really stand a chance against you though"

His power was truly incredible; I couldn't even hear Jacob's thoughts while he had control over his mind. A thought accord to though that Jacob probably wasn't having any thoughts while under his power. His mind was completely blank except for the orders he would give.

"Just who the hell are you!?" I yelled.

"My name is Dietrich if you must know, not that it really makes a difference. I met a lot of creatures in my life vampires, humans, and the most recent, werewolves but I do not recall ever meeting someone named Dietrich.

"Why…Why are you doing this!? What I ever do to you!? What did Bella ever do!? Why make her suffer!?" I shouted.

He seemed to grow angrier with each of my words.

He snapped his fingers again and once again Jacob had me pinned to the ground, his teeth at my throat and his desire to kill me back in his unfamiliar eyes.

I shoved Jacob off me as lightly as I could as I did not want to hurt him.

Before I could fully stand two iron arms locked themselves around me, making it barely possible for me to even squirm, dam him and his newborn strength.

"Dam you! Why Jacob!? Why Bella!? What did she ever do to you!?

"It's because of that wench that I am damned!" He shouted.

Using some new found strength from the anger his insult to Bella had created I elbowed him in the stomach and managed to break free.

"Never call her that!" I growled loudly kicking him in the face.

Before I could assess any damage I may have done, Jacob leapt at me from behind and pinned me once again, only this time he dug his teeth into my shoulder, Bella will not be happy if she sees that.

"She's worse than a wench; she's a bitch from hell for what she did to me!"

"She doesn't even know you!" I yelled, I was growing frustrated with him just what the hell could he be talking about? I would know if she was around him, I could easily smell any new scent on her. Plus I knew even if she tried to hide it from me I would know something was going on, she's an awful liar and I can easily see any change in her.

"It's her fault that I'm like this! She turned me into this!" he yelled.

"What are you talking about!? You aren't making any sense!" I shouted, growing more frustrated. Was he insane? Could vampires even be insane? He has to be how else could he think Bella could change him? She doesn't have any venom!

"For someone whose over a century old you're not very bright"

"Just get on with it!" I had no patience to deal with his insults about my intelligence.

"Have you not noticed where we are? Just look around, were you not here a short time ago?"

I hadn't really noticed where I was, just that I was in the woods. I was too caught up in ripping this vampire shreds for what he did to my Bella.

I was hesitant to take my eyes off of him but once I noticed the environment around him the familiarity of it began to sink in. I was in the same woods that I hid with Bella in when the newborns attacked.

"Why did you bring me here? How do you know about this place?" I questioned, shocked.

"Because I was apart of that army" he said firmly.

"But that's impossible they were all killed, we made sure of it! How could you have possibly survived?"

"Because I was different!" He roared, a growl ripping through his chest.

"I wasn't a mindless blood thirsty monster like the rest! I still have my humanity!"

He shoved Jacob's large form off of me, grabbed me by the collar and slammed me against a large boulder. I could tell he was holding back as the boulder only cracked beneath me. If he was using his full strength it surely would have shattered.

"But I lost my soul and all because of your little girlfriend! It's because of her that that red-headed bitch Victoria attacked me on my way home and changed me!"

He pulled me away from the boulder and slammed me into the ground. He made sure not to hold back as he stomped his foot on me, the ground shaking and cracking, I'm sure a few of my bones cracked as well.

"I lost everything because of her! I had a wife and a family! I was a respectable doctor that saved lives! Now all I want to do is take them!"

My still heart sunk at his words, a very, very small part of me even pitied him. He was a good man with a life that was from him, all so he die in a clearing. Still, it gave him no right to hurt Bella, she was innocent.

He panted heavily while taking unnecessary breaths as his anger slowly faded to pain. He let his foot off me and sat on the cracked boulder.

I managed to get to my feet while clutching me chest. Pain shot through while my wounds healed, I could feel my bones mending beneath my fingers.

Jacob had remained more still than the tree beside him as he watched the whole ordeal silently, even in his mind. He was simply waiting for an order from his master.

"Look… I understand your pain and where you are coming from" I explained "But it wasn't Bella who did this to you, she didn't want to this fate for you, if she could have she would have saved you. It was Victoria who bit you. Victoria who forced into that army, Victoria who took your life away, not Bella"

"The way I see it their both guilty, so they both must die and since you already took care of Victoria for me that only leaves Bella"

"NO!" I shouted, grabbing him and shocking him through the damaged boulder.

I felt something sharp dig its way into my leg; I knew was Jacob reacting to my attack on his master. He violently tugged on my leg trying to pull me away from him but I held my ground firmly.

"No! I won't let her die! Give it to me! Give me the cure damn it!" I yelled, half crazed while intensifying my death glare to its full effect.

He sighed at me, completely unaffected by my rage; he seemed to be growing bored.

"There is no cure"

"What….?" I barely whispered.

"I told you before I was a doctor before I was changed. I took a number of illness from the research lab and combined them together"

"That's impossible Alice would have seen you!" I argued, hoping, no begging he was somehow wrong.

"I never said I was the one who injected her, what do you think I needed the dog for?"

The shock of all this knowledge shocked me till I could not move and Jacob pulled me to the ground. He quickly jumped me and pinned me once more, though I still felt all movement was impossible as this sunk in.

"I told you I know more about you than you think, I was much more stable than the other newborns so she made me a 'sergeant' if you will and told me all about your little coven, including strengths and weaknesses"

"How did you ever survive against the attack?"

"Like I said I was different. I stayed in the back waiting for Victoria to leave, then I took my chance and ran"

I couldn't believe what he was telling me, it couldn't be. How could I have let all of this happen? How could I have been so careless with my dear Bella?

Was there truly no way to save her? No, no it can't be I can't lose her! Not again!

"Face it Edward, She's going to die

"No…" I barely whispered.

"Denial" he laughed and evil smile spread across his face.

"But don't worry" he said, getting up "You'll be joining her"

Jacob suddenly more pressure against me and sank his teeth into my neck.

Between Jacob and the emotions running through me movement was impossible.

No! I couldn't die! Not yet! I have to find a way to cure Bella! There has to be some way!

"Goodbye Edward" I saw Bella and all her glory flash before my eyes as I felt him placed his hands in my hair and tug.

**Please review and tell me what you think! did i do okay? was it worth the wait? Did I do a good job capturing Edward's character? You can be honest i enjoy critcism. And again sorry about any spelling/grmmar issues.  
**


	13. Chapter 12

**Sorry guys know i've been kinda like dead for awhile but i've been super busy with college, work, and school. I cant finally take driving out of the equation because i got my permit! Although i still need to find a away to pay for driving school...Anywho, I'm super sorry i haven't updated in awhile but thank you all so much for your reviews! Your wonderful reviews are the main thing that keep me writing**. **I hope you all enjoy this chapter, personally i didn't think its that good but then i again i say that about a lot of my chapters. Its more so another bridge chapter i think, well anyway please let me know what you think, enjoy and review!**

I felt a slight tug at the end's of my hair when suddenly an enormous roar erupted through the forest, possibly shattering same of the bark on the trees. In a flash I was completely weightless as Jacob and Dietrich were thrown off of me.

The sound that was flowing throughout the forest was louder than the earlier roar. It sounded like I was near a construction zone as boulders collided violently with one another.

I sat up and looked over to see a larger figure on top of a smaller one as the large one savagely beat the other.

"THAT'S FOR MESSING WITH MY FAMILY!" The large figured roared as he punched the smaller one. I immediately recognized the voice, Emmett.

"THAT'S FOR INFECTING BELLA!" he yelled with another punch.

Bella…

"AND THIS" He yelled raising his arm as high as he could "IS FOR HURTING MY LITTLE BROTHER!"

How Emmett, after all this time and the gap between how long we've been "living", he still considers me the younger one.

With one fell swoop Emmett's hand connected with Dietrich's face, I know that had I not been a vampire I would never have seen the punch and I surely would have gone deaf at the incredible sound the connection made.

I could see Emmett's large form panting heavily, though unnecessarily, above Dietrich, who was now for some reason completely still.

I made my way over only to see a large hole in the ground right where Dietrich's head should have been but was now gone.

"…We still have to burn him" I said quietly. I knew Dietrich was dead, that was one sure fire way to kill a vampire, though the task is not easily completed, but one could never be to careful.

Emmett nodded and took a lighter from his pocket while standing before tossing it on to Dietrich's headless body. We both watched in silence as he burned away.

"…You should have let me do it" I said, a bit angry, I wanted to be the one to kill him.

"Your welcome" Emmett said rolling his eyes.

I let out an angry, frustrated, sigh. Truly, I did want to kill the bastard and now the opportunity had been taken from me and I was never going to get it back.

"Look I know your pissed and you wanted to kill him but now's not the time to get upset over who killed who, we need to focus on Bella" Emmett said. I could tell that for once he was using his brain because he was actually right, now was not the time for me to get caught up in my revenge. But what could I do?  
"Wait…how much to do you know?" I asked. It had just occurred to me what Emmett said during his rage, though he had not been present for Dietrich's confession of infecting Bella.

"We've been here since you first tackled him"

"How…?"

"Bella got scared when you left like that and called for us, Alice started to panic because she couldn't see you anymore, so me and Jasper came after you" He explained.

"Jasper? But where is he?"

"Uhh…" Emmett said looking around "he was here a minute ago"

"Guys down here!" We heard him whisper.

We followed the whisper and his scent down the hill I tumbled down previously when I first caught up to Dietrich. When we got to the bottom we saw Jasper constricting his body around Jacob's now sleeping wolf form.

"Uhh…" Emmett and I said at the same time.

"Shhh" Jasper whispered "I just got him to sleep"

"What the hell" Emmett said.

"Shh!" Jasper hushed again "Now give me a hand I don't wanna wake him"

Confused as can be, Emmett and I managed to help Jasper get free and keep Jacob asleep.

"Care to explain?" Emmett said looking at Jasper.

"When I got him off Edward, he was defensive as can be and managed to bite me a few times but then I managed to wrapped myself around him to keep him from moving. Once I got him I made him as calm as I possibly could and eventually, stop fighting but then he suddenly became really confused and passed out"

"You said you got him to sleep"

"Same thing" Jasper said shrugging.

I barely paid attention at all to their conversation, the explanation held little meaning to me, all I could think was Bella.

"Hello Edward? You in there bro?" Emmett said waving his large hand in my face.

"Sorry…" I said coming out of it "Now exactly how long have you two been here?"

"I told you we caught up with you right when you tackled him and you two went tumbling down the hill, you were too caught up in your anger to really notice us" Emmett said.

"And we had a feeling we should probably let you handle this since we were pretty sure he had something to with Bella form the get go" Jasper said.

"But I sure as hell wasn't about to let him kill you and you barely moved when he grabbed your head" Emmett said.

"Oh" was my only response, I was grateful that they stayed behind and helped me out when I needed it, but it didn't matter what did matter was Bella was dieing and I had no way of healing her. Alice's vision was coming closer and closer to being reality, it was constantly playing over and over in my mind, I can't let that happen…I can't let her die.

"Yo Edward stay with us" Emmett said, braking my train of thoughts once again.

"We need to get back and talk to Carlisle so we can figure out how to save Bella" Jasper said.

We all suddenly heard the whimper of a wolf as we turned and stared at Jacob's still sleeping form.

"…And there's also him to take care of" Emmett said.

I walked over and knelt beside him, I couldn't help but pity the poor boy. He had lost the love of his life to another man and now he was just trying to escape only to be used and hurt and possibly kill his love.

I gently petted his head, his body felt like fire beneath my ice hand.

"…What should we do with him?" Jasper asked. I could tell he as feeling my pity for Jacob, but I'm pretty sure he had some for Jacob too, as well as Emmett.

I gently picked up Jacob and began a slow vampire, fast human run, Emmett and Jasper following in suit.

"Where are you going?" Emmett asked.

"He isn't aware of what he's done I could from his thoughts when he wasn't in Deitrich's control. We'll find a vacant area and leave him, he'll wake up thinking what he remembers to only be a dream"

I didn't have to turn around to know Emmett and Jasper were both nodding.

This was the least I could do for Jacob, he has enough pain to deal with, he doesn't need this on his shoulders as well.

After running for some time we found a good enough spot and I laid Jacob on a pile of leaves, I was grateful he was still unconscious.

"Let's just keep this between the three of us there's no reason for anyone else to know" I said, turning to my brother's, they both nodded in response and we took off.

"Edward…what about Bella?" Emmett asked, once we were closer to the hospital.

"You heard what he said there's no cure how can we possibly save her?" I said angrily, turning back to them.

They both stared at me with a serious look on their face.

"It might be the only way…" Jasper eventually said quietly.

"NO!" I shouted "NOT YET! I CAN'T DO IT YET! I MADE HER A PROMISE!"

Emmett and Jasper stayed silent as I continued to yell.

"I WON'T DO IT! I WON'T CHANGE HER BECAUSE OF THIS! THERE HAS TO BE ANOTHER WAY!"

Suddenly Emmett caught me off guard and punched me across the face, knocking me over.

"That's enough Edward, just look at what your doing to Jasper"

I glanced over at him to see he was just as full of rage as I was and it seemed he was having a hard time not knocking a tree or two over. It didn't matter though, I would not do this I didn't care if they didn't understand.

"Be rational Edward would you rather let her die than change her?"

Now jumping on to my feet it was my turn to punch Emmett.

"Never say that" I said darkly.

"Well sorry Edward but that's exactly what your doing" he said getting up "I don't understand Edward you already agreed to change her"

"Because she has a set amount of time left as a human and she needs to spend them being human as humanely possible"

"Edward trust me, Bella doesn't care about that stuff she just wants to be with you" Jasper said, of course he would know.

"Look…I just…I just can't not yet okay?"

"Why?" Jasper asked.

I knew that if I was human I would probably be blushing right now, I couldn't possibly let them know about mine and Bella's promise.

"Just forget it" I said harshly.  
I could tell by the way they stared at me they both were curious as to what I was talking about but wouldn't pressure me to tell me, something I was very grateful for.

"Fine" Emmett said, stepping forward "But get it through your thick head Edward, if it comes down to it and you still won't bite her I will" he warned.

"And I'll do it if he can't" Jasper said.

I couldn't believe it, even Jasper who nearly killed when he got a paper cut, was

willing to try biting her. Bella truly was a part of my family, it's only a matter of time now until it is official.

"We need to get back and talk to Carlisle" Jasper said.

"But what can he do? There's no cure" I said quietly.

"You rather let her die? We have to at least see what he has to say on the matter, if all else fails…"

_We bite her_ I thought, finishing the sentence for Emmett.

I really shouldn't be so afraid of Alice's vision, she wouldn't die. Even I would bite her if it was truly the only way to keep her going, it just seemed so real.

"Fine" I said and with that I took off, hoping to leave my brothers behind a bit as I ran through the forest to clear my head.

Thankfully they seemed to compile and stayed back somewhat. I thought of Bella as I ran, just like I was always thinking of her. Whether I'm sitting, running, hunting or anything, Bella was always on my mind.

I thought of her beautiful face which reminded me of an angel's, even when she had just woken up. I thought of her wonderful, soft warm touch that made smile enough to reach my ears. And most of all I thought of the kisses her and I would always share that would make my dead heart beat, and always make me feel, just a little more human than monster.

How could I possibly go on without her in my life? I tried and look what happened, we were both nearly killed because of my stupidity. No, I would not do that again, I would not be so foolish. I needed her and she needed me, there was no other way around it. I couldn't just let her die over something like this, there would be plenty of time for….that…after she was changed. I needed to keep her here, and I knew she wanted to stay here, for some reason, with me.

I made it back to the hospital and looked up to see the light of my angel's room shining, knowing my life lay with in it. I walked back inside, vowing to not let Alice's vision come true.

**For like the trillionth time, sorry for any spelling or grammar issues. **

**IMPORTANT!: Since i am constantly making mistakes and apologizing for them at the end of every chapter i think its time i got a beta for my story. Anyone whose insterested in Beta-ing my story please PM me about it, don't put it in a review. I just have one requirement please stay up to task with me on this story. I've had some bad experiences with Betas in which i never hear from them at all, or they suddenly disappear. All i ask is that you don't vanish on me! Thanks to all who apply and all my fans of my story! **


	14. Chapter 13

**hey guys sry i haven't updated in forever my only excuse being that i've been super busy between school/college/work etc. Again so sry but i hope you like the chpater. Please enjoy and review as always.**

"Edward! Are you alright!?" Esme's motherly voice rang through the halls as she saw me pass through the doors. She ran over to me and gave me a small hug before examining me over, I knew she wanted to hold onto me longer but she knew how much I needed to see Bella.

"I'm fine mom" I said quietly as I continued walking.

I heard the door reopening and heard Esme shout "Boys!" and I knew she was giving them the reunion she wanted to give me. I admit it did hurt a bit to ignore Esme like this, its not that I wanted to ignore her, I just had to get to Bella. I'd make it up to her somehow, maybe buy her a new house so she can decorate it, she always loves to decorate.

I was trying to walk as fast and casually as possible, dammit! Why did hospitals need to have so many people!? It made it increasingly difficult to utilize my speed.

"Annoying isn't it?" Rosalie said, suddenly appearing next to me.

"You have no idea."

"I guess," she said quietly. But she really didn't know, her time with Emmett as a human was brief and after wards, what did she really have to worry about that could hurt someone like Emmett? She never experienced anything like watching the love of your life slowly decay away before your very eyes. And surely she did not understand the frustration it caused to not be able to use my speed so I could get my Bella quicker all so I could keep up the charade for some stupid humans.

"…Edward wait!" She said suddenly.

"What," I said; I continued walking refusing to stop.

"Just wait a damn minute Edward I need to talk to you," she said with some slight anger.

I sighed a heavy sigh, not covering up the annoyance she was causing me, yet nonetheless I did stop.

"You should know that Alice is in there with her and Carlisle is still looking through some things"

"And…" At the moment, their current locations meant little to me. I knew wherever they were they would be fine but Bella wouldn't, not without me to save her from this.

"And she's been trying to calm her down the entire time you've been gone. How could you just leave her like that Edward?"

Rosalie's words tore at my heart, I knew it was wrong to leave Bella the way I did but I could not just stand the thought of another one of my kind so close to her.

"What happened out there anyway?" She said after a moment when I didn't respond.

"Ask Emmett he was there I don't have the time Rose," I said turning my back to her.

"Wait!" She said suddenly.

"What Rose?" I was beginning to grow aggravated and I did not let my expression or tone hide it.

"…Are you going to?" Rose asked and I knew what she was asking me.

"...If there is no other way to keep her here….perhaps"

"Perhaps"

"Look I don't know yet Rose I can't lose Bella but I don't want to damn her either"

"…Edward," she said but I did not respond, I just stared at a tile on the ground with a pained expression until she would let me leave.

"Listen…I know I'm not Bella's biggest fan but she is a part of this family now…and if we lose her its not just going to be hard on you…and she's really not so bad, I just don't agree with her choices" Rosalie said.

I was still a little surprised to hear such positive words about Bella coming from Rosalie's mouth. I knew their relationship had increased some what but I guess I miscalculated.

"Look if it were me in there I would rather die, but it's not its Bella. You know how much she wants to spend eternity with you and how much she actually wants to become one of us," Rosalie changed her frequency at the end, making it so only my ears and my families could hear.

"I don't thinking you'll be damning her Edward, and yes I know this is odd for me but I can't stand to see our family like this, you like this…even her like this."

I was more still than a statue as my lips were set in a hard line while I listened to Rosalie's speech.

"There are so many things you've been wanting to give since you've met her, you've wanted to spoil her rotten and give her all the things she wanted, this is the only thing she has ever wanted from you aside from yourself"

If she only knew the double meaning behind her last words.

"Please Edward, I'm asking you…don't let her die" Rosalie pleaded.

"I won't" I vowed.

"Good…because even though it goes against everything I stand for…if you won't do it I will"

"You're the fourth person to tell me that"

"Well then maybe you should realize just how much we all need her too." She said and walked off.

I knew how desperately my family needed Bella and I knew that even those who didn't tell me they would turn her would if there was no other way.

But they were all being too hypocritical in my opinion. I knew they all loved Bella, but it was nothing compared to my love for her. None would go as far as I would should she die, they would grieve forever yes, but they would be able to handle it. I could not, and would not. She is my everything I am nothing without her.

Finally being free of my families speeches I headed as quickly as humanely possible (as irritating as that was) to Bella's room.

When I arrived back the sight before me tore my dead heart to shreds, it was like it was going through a meat grinder.

Bella lay in the arms of Alice, crying hysterically and looked sicker and weaker than she ever has. Her normal creamy skin was gone and had turned an unnatural shade of white. Without my vision, it might be difficult to recognize her amongst the white sheets.

She looked like she was using all of her energy just to cry and once she stopped, there would be nothing left. She was so small, so fragile on that bed, I wanted to break down right there, but I knew I could not, my Bella needed, me and I would be there.

I rushed to Bella's side, tore her from Alice's arms and cradled her gently to my chest. This movement was far to fast for her human mind to register, I could tell by the way she let out a confused "E-Edward?" sob into my chest, it nearly killed me.

"Shh my love yes its me its okay."

"Oh Edward," she cried, trying to put her weak arms around me.

"No don't move love" I told her.

As always though, she refused to listen and put her small arms around me weakly, even in this state she's stubborn as ever.

"She thought you weren't going to come back," Alice said, speaking for the first time.

"Bell how many times do I have to tell you I will never leave you, I can't leave you, I need you my heart." I told her with love for her coating my lips.

She tilted her head slightly to look up at me, her beautiful chocolate brown eyes were dull and lacking of life. She tried to move her head up towards me but she lacked the strength. I could tell what she wanted though and happily leaned to press my lips firmly against her own.

She was just barely able to kiss me back; still it held so much love in it. I don't understand how so much love could come from someone so small and for someone like me. Nonetheless, I willing accepted it and returned just as much if not more.

"…that's not what I meant," Alice said, after we had broken apart.

"She was worried you had…left our world" Alice explained.

I could tell she was trying to choose her words carefully and avoid actually saying that I died, still Bella flinched when she said the words, I rubbed her arm gently and held her close to me.

"Don't worry I'm fine." I whispered in her ear, it seemed to calm her down.

"Why would you worry like that love? You know how strong I am"

"It was because I couldn't see you, because you left like that and disappeared from my vision, it scared us all" Alice explained for her.

Even though Alice was the one talking, I kept my eyes on Bella, and her own eyes stayed on mine. I stroked her cheek before I started to trace the feature of her beautiful face with my fingertips, she was still so soft, and yet somewhat cold, how I missed her warmth.

I could see her hand twitching, in effort to try and bring it to my face to trace my own features, it was a gesture we commonly did to each other, as if we hadn't already memorized everything about each other. It was as if we got something new and wonderful out of it each time it had happened.

However, I know how weak she was so I took my hand and placed it firmly on top of hers, preventing her from wasting what little strength she still had.

"Edward…where were you?" Alice asked. I could tell she was also asking for Bella, and it was the only reason she had not left yet.

"…Later." I said still gazing upon Bella.

"E-Edward?" Bella said, I could tell it still hurt her to speak, which is probably why Alice had to speak her.

"Shh…later I promise you need rest now."

Alice left after that knowing I wouldn't answer and probably to get the info from someone else.

I could tell Bella really did need her rest; after all it was late so I moved her so she was lying in the middle of the bed. Not even a second after I let go did she start to whimper from the loss of contact. I myself felt an odd sensation all around my arms, my fingertips, my chest and I knew it was my desire to once again hold her.

I lay down next to her and moved her so her head was resting, somehow comfortably, on my shoulder. I wrapped my arms securely around her, keeping her close to my side, practically on top of me. Even though I had planned on lying with her from the start my body still ached for the short moment we weren't touching.

I kissed the top of her head while gently stroking her hair as I began to hum her her lullaby. I knew there was still a raging curiosity within her as to where I went before but in the end her exhaustion won as her eyelids eventually closed and her breathing became steady.

As I watched her sleep I lost all track of time as her chest gently rose and fell, I was completely mesmerized simply by her breathing. I also found myself somewhat nervous that it may suddenly stop. It couldn't stop…not yet.

Eventually at some point during the night, Carlisle entered the room; I still refused to tear my eyes from Bella.

"Son…" he began, standing beside us.

"There's something important I must discuss with you"

I had a good idea where this was going and I sighed, not wanting to discuss it again.

"Please Carlisle…not now"

"Hear me out."

"What?"

"There just maybe a way for you to save her without changing her"

**For once i dont feel the need to apologize for spellinganf grammar thanks to my wonderful Beta Loulabelle! thanks for all your help!**


	15. Chapter 14

**Hello, I'm not dead lol, sorry everyone that this took so long my only excuse is that i've been busy with college and stuff so sorry though! Thanks to everyone of course who reviewed, alerted, etc, or even just read my story. It means so much to me to know you all love my story. I hope you all like the chapter though if you have any questions please let me know ill be happy to answer and as always please njoy and review!**

"…What?" I said bewildered.

Carlisle just looked at me with a blank expression.

"Why didn't you tell me this sooner?" I said with some edge to my voice. I was angry with him for keeping this from me. Why wouldn't he tell about something like this?

Carlisle maneuvered himself around the room and sat in the chair beside the bed.

"Because Edward I don't know if this can work."

"Just tell me." There would be time later for his excuses; I just need to heal Bella.

_Flashback_

_I was officially 100 as of last week. Humans never got see this day, or be this healthy if you can call what I am healthy. Still it seemed odd to me, to know that 77 years ago I was attacked, went through hell and was damned. I never thought I would survive this long, evening knowing what I am. I still refuse to touch human blood, something most vampires laugh at me for. It didn't matter to me though, I wouldn't have someone's life on my conscious for eternity, nor would I be a monster like the rest of my kind. Still, it got lonely, being the only one living this lifestyle and no one really understanding my views. But what can I do? _

_The day I turned 100, I still felt exactly the same as the day that I emerged from the potato storage. Strong, fast, healthy, and thirsty, oh so thirsty. Though maybe now I wasn't as thirsty but it was always there and always would be, I knew it would only become tolerable and never fully go away. It had crossed my mind a few times and I wondered if I did taste human blood, would the burn disappear? Even for just a few hours? The price though, did not seem worth it at all. _

_That same day though, I realized that even though 100 years had gone by, I not only felt the same but I still was the same. The same 23 year old pale vampire with golden eyes and blonde hair. And I realized I would be like this forever. _

_So I made the best I could with the life I have and was becoming a doctor, repeatedly. It was annoying to have some humans think I needed training when in reality I should be training them no matter how many years of experience I had. Occasionally I would have to do something out of the ordinary and use my skills to the fullest in order to save someone's life. The humans were always astounded and I would always just shrug it off. What else could I do? How else could I explain all the knowledge I have? _

_So here I was, running through the forest at an unnatural speed, finishing up my lunch of some deer, 100 years old, with thousands of more years to come most likely. I was headed to England to enroll, once again, in medical school while volunteering at the clinic. I had overstayed my welcome in India and was due for some change of scenery. And a place where people wouldn't recognize my lack of physical growth. Where I would once as be as a stranger. Where I would once again be the 23 year old Carlisle Cullen, pre-med student. I had been to medical school about 3 times already, but I think it was time to brush up on my skills and maybe even learn a few things. It had been about 20 years since I've gone and the medical world does change everyday. There are a few new medicines in development that I would like to study up as well as a few new surgeries as well. _

_I was think up possible back stories I could use once I arrived at my destination, _

_Carlisle Cullen, 23, White, respected young lad whose parents tragically died at a young age and forced to raise himself, skipping around homes. _

_Or maybe _

_Carlisle Cullen, 23, White, small-town delinquent whose trying to turn his life around after the murder of his parents._

_Or perhaps my favorite_

_Carlisle Cullen, 23, out of country student wanting to attend a good school. It was simple and less morbid of the few since my parents wouldn't be dead. I could easily forge letters from them in other handwritings saying how they missed me and how proud they were. _

_But this wasn't why it was my favorite choice; it was my favorite because it gave me an excuse to not get close to anyone. _

"_I'm really here to just learn, I plan on returning home at some point" _

_The perfect white lie that would have the humans keep a respectable distance from me. After all I could never have anyone get to close to me. I could never have anyone be sucked into this life, damn somebody like this. I've let people die before, knowing I could have turned them and saved them. But what kind of life could I really offer them?_

"_You either kill people or kill animals like me!" A wonderful choice, don't you think? _

_I'd be lying though, if I said I didn't want somebody here. Someone to talk too, to understand my views, to argue with even when we disagreed, just somebody, anybody. But alas, my kind does not understand me and I could never turn a human for my own selfish reasons. _

_Before I was changed, I used to think about maybe when I got older if I would one meet a women, fall in love, and even get married. Even if I was to be a priest I could still get married in the Anglican Church. We would be so happy together, just laughing and talking. Then maybe someday have kids, and they can come watch me give service, it would have been wonderful._

_All my thoughts of love and marriage ceased the day I came out of the potato storage and I saw my skin sparkle in the sun. I would never have a wife, never have children, and my dreams of having them come watch me give service were burnt up in the sun. _

_I knew as a vampire I could take a mate with another, but none held any interest for me. Some females had approached me, even made advances, but more than anything they just creeped me out. They didn't understand my life choices and would often laugh when I told about my eating habits. Some would even tempt me to try human blood, which was when I cut of contact completely. Most females were cold hearted killers, always giving into the monster in them, just like the rest of my kind. I would never judge them for it, or be rude them either, it was their choice and life, not mine. But for me to take one of them as my wife, I think not. I would just have to settle for loneliness, at least it would always be there for me. _

_I was racing through the trees going as fast as I possibly could. Running was one of them few things I loved about being what I was. I was really able to let go and just enjoy the feeling. I was going so fast I was sure I was a complete blur going through the trees, that's why when the scent hit me I nearly fell to the ground. _

_I came so quickly, perhaps I had been too lost in my thoughts and running to notice the scent of a human. Or perhaps my restraint to them was getting stronger. Being around them was simple for me now; the scent of their blood was just uncomfortable. Still I recognized it, and I knew where it was coming from and I immediately took off in that direction. However, unlike most vampires I would not kill this person when I arrived._

_I came to a stop at a horrid sight in the woods. A small girl, with long curly brown hair and bright green eyes was laying on the ground covered in blood. And in front of her was hungry and angry looking wolf. He was slowly inching his way towards her, baring his fangs and snarling at the poor child. _

_The girl had tears running down her face and was absolutely terrified. I could not let this child become this wolf's next meal; she was so young, 6, maybe 7, too young. _

_I ran over quickly and grabbed the wolf by the neck, and quickly tossed him to the side. I made sure to use enough of my strength to injure the wolf when it landed but not so much that that girl would be confused. _

_It landed with a hard thud and immediately got up and took off, apparently realizing my strength. _

_I then turned my attention back to the girl, she looked less afraid now that the wolf was gone but was still crying, probably from pain. _

_I slowly made my way over to her and knelt next to her, she looked up at me tears in her eyes as well and as fear._

"_What's your name little one?" I asked as soft as I could._

"…_S-Sarah" she said._

"_That's a pretty name, my name is Carlisle and I'm doctor do you mind if I have a look at your wounds?" No need to put up the charade here. _

"_N-No!" she said between sobs. She didn't look as afraid but was probably still in a lot of pain. _

"_Don't worry you'll be okay." I said, trying to reassure her._

_She winced at my coldness when I first touched her._

"_Sorry I've been outside all day." _

"…_I-It's okay." _

"_How old are you Sarah?" I asked while examine her, I hoping to take her mind of the pain._

"_6 and a ½." She said, I laughed a little, I was off by a ½._

"_What?" she asked._

"_Nothing" I told her "You're very smart to know about fractions at such a young age."_

"_My daddy teaches me."_

"_Really? He must be very smart and proud of you then."_

_To this, she nodded, and it seemed that her tears were finally beginning to slow._

"_How did you get all the way out here Sarah?" _

"_I was playing in our yard when I saw a butterfly, I started to chase it and before I knew it I was lost, then that mean wolf showed up and hurt me."_

"_I see." Such innocence. _

_I had already examined her arms and legs without her really seeming to notice, to which I was grateful. There were some bad bite marks that would take a while to heal, but they would heal nonetheless. Then I got to her side._

_Her side was apparently very small and breakable in the wolf's mouth, because it had pierced all the way to her liver. The wounds were also bad enough for fluid in the liver to seep out and blood to get in. There was no way to save her. Soon she would __She would die. She'd get sick first, probably have a fever, but she would pass. Even with my experience there was nothing I could do. _

_I felt so helpless, seeing this poor girl before and knowing there was nothing I could do. I had dedicated my life to aiding those who today's doctors could not save, and here I was watching a child die before me and there was nothing I could I do. All I could really do was take her back to her family._

"_...what?" she asked, noticing the shift in my behavior._

"_Nothing." I lied. _

_Her face told me she was skeptical but she remained silent. _

"_I'm going to take you home." I told her gathering her up into my arms, she was so small, fragile, and light..._

"_Really?" she asked excitedly. _

_I nodded._

"_Thank you mister." she said, despite her weakened state her face broke out into a wide yet weak smile, she was excited to be going home, I wonder what of felt like._

_It tore my insides to shreds as I knew this small girl would soon perish. I was both grateful and sad to not be able to cry at that moment. Grateful because she wouldn't worry, sad because I would have liked to have been able to shreds even just a few tears for this poor child and release some of my pain._

_Children were always the hardest to lose, so young, so full of life, so...sudden. And then to have to break the news to their parents, truly the hardest part of the job. _

_I had begun to make a slow human pace as to not cause her any pain when I smelled it, or should I say him? A vampire. _

_He wasn't far and was making his way towards us, following the trail of her blood. _

_I didn't have a choice I would have to fight; even with her dying in my arms I would not allow this child to become his next meal. _

_As quickly as I had realized he was nearby, he was in front of me._

_Sensing the danger, Sarah clung to me, despite her wounds. _

_I kept her close to me without causing her pain and let out a low growl that only him and I could hear._

_He was old for someone of my kind; he must have been around 50 when he was turned. His black hair was dark like his eyes; it must have been awhile since he last ate._

"_I don't want to fight, I just want the girl." _

"_No." I said firmly. _

"_I mean her no harm."_

"_How can I trust you?"_

"_How can I trust you?"_

_Was he mocking me?_

"_I'm not going to give this child."_

"_I can't let you have her, she will not be a meal."_

"_...pardon?" I said, taken aback by his words._

"_She doesn't deserve to die like that"_

_She flinched at his words._

"_Relax... You'll be fine." I told her, she seemed to relax a little._

"_How sick" He spat._

"_What are you talking about?" I asked, truly lost._

"_I know what you plan to do with that child, I'm not going to let that happen she deserves better."_

"_I'm not going to hurt her." I said in all truth. _

_His eyes raked over me, assessing what I said._

"_Then hand her over."_

"_Why so you can have her?"_

_"No so I can heal her."_

_"…Excuse me?" I know I heard him correctly, but I didn't understand how it could be possible. _

_"I can heal her"_

_"How?"_

_He started to slowly make his way over to us._

_I tightened my hold on her, but not enough to hurt her._

"_Relax I'm not going to hurt her."_

_I don't know why, but in that moment I decided to trust him. I knew  
that if he tried something I could react quickly enough, yet he seemed like he really did care about her. _

_He raised his hand and gently touched her arm. She flinched a little at first contact but she seemed to relax after a little while. He pushed her clothes aside gently to assess the damage. His Face turned grim as he realized what I already knew, I'm sure my face was a reflection of his own. Then he gently placed his hand on her forehead and a miracle took place in my very arms. All of her wounds closed up and vanished as If they were never there._

_End flashback_

"Then what?" I asked.

"She was perfectly fine as if she had never been hurt at all so we took her home, her parents were so grateful they through us a huge dinner party in honor."

"She did but he simply smiled at her and said 'magic' and that's the thing about children their young enough to believe in magic and accept it as perfectly logical."

"Why are you telling me all this Carlisle? What does any of it have to do with Bella?"

"He let out a heavy sigh and ran his hand through his hair before continuing.

"His name was Aldric and yes he is in fact a vampire, his ability to heal was his special power."

"What? That doesn't make any sense why would a vampire be given a power like that?"

"I don't know Edward my best guess would be that it had something to do with him being a doctor before he was turned, however he was the most dedicated one I had ever seen. He studied constantly and was always trying to develope new methods and medicines to heal people. He had not one friend, nor did he ever go out, as human he simply worked."

"How cruel it must've been when he realized what he became."

"Yes, that's I why believe that perhaps maybe god or someone took pity on him after he was attacked one and gave him this power, however he doesn't see it that way."

"He doesn't?"

"No, actually he sees more as an insult, he can only heal people when he's strong enough to resist their blood."

"I see…but…again what does any of this have to do with Bella?"

"Because…his power wasn't only limited to healing the injured…he could heal the sick too."

"The sick? The sick like Bella sick?"

"Yes, after our encounter with Sarah we traveled for sometime together. I explained my lifestyle to him and he immediately switched vowing to never harm a human again. He power was truly amazing he heal the worst injuries and sickest patients… " He trailed off a little at the end and shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

"What?"

No response.

"Carlisle?"

"…Look Edward I don't know if it's the best course of action."

"Why?"

"Because…Aldric doesn't use the power on just anyone he doesn't think its right for him, a vampire, to play God"

"But it might be the only way, I will convince him Carlisle."

"Edward she doesn't have much time and I don't even know where he is even if you found him how can you expect to convince him?"

"I'll find a way Carlisle this might be the only way to save her."

"Edward…I think it might be better if you just ch-"

"No!"

"Edward think about it."

"I have Carlisle numerous times…look I…" I didn't think I could explain my promise to Bella; the embarrassment was just too much. Who wants to talk about having sex with their girlfriend with their father?

"Look…I made a promise to Bella…a promise to do something with her before she was changed…and I haven't gotten to yet…I just…can't deny her this one last thing. You know I would give her the world if she wouldn't yell at me for spending so much money and giving her a gift" Hopefully that would be enough for him to understand.

He got up and walked over to and then gently put his hand on my shoulder.

"Son I know how difficult it is to make this decision, we all do, I had to make it with Esme and Rosalie with Emmett, its not an easy one and I know how against this you are that's why I told you about him but also I don't think you two are truly ready yet, this isn't how either of you wanted to go about it."

He hit the nail on the coffin with that one, this was defiantly not how I wanted my Bella to be changed and I don't think she wanted it this way either.

"It's up to you son I'll support either decision you make."

I looked down at the beautiful girl asleep in my arms and in her I saw everything I could ever want in someone, everything I had been searching for all these years, the one person who made my dead heart beat and brought a smile to my face that I long forgotten since our meeting all bottled up into the form of this angel laying in my arms. I could not lose her there would be nothing, absolutely nothing, without her. If she died I don't know that I'd even be able to last the plane ride to the Volturi for my execution.

I gently pulled her closer to me and pressed my lips to hers, putting all the love that I could into it, even if she was asleep.

Suddenly, I felt her kissed me back and I was worried for a moment that I woken her up, but when I listened carefully I could tell she was still breathing slowly, yet her heart rate had picked up slightly. She was kissing me in her sleep; her body reacted to me without her being aware, would this girl ever stop surprising me? I doubt it and I hoped not.

I slowly got out of the bed and laid her down gently. Once I was no longer touching her she rolled over and her arm reached out for me before falling over to the side of the bed. I rolled her back over and gently took her hand in mine.

"Carlisle?"

"Yes?"

"I have to at least try…but…if anything should happen…if I taking too long…"

"Don't worry Edward I won't let her die you have my word."

"Thank you dad." I knew what it meant to him when I called him that and he truly was like my father in so many ways.

Still I refused to take my eyes off Bella through our whole conversation. How could I? She was so beautiful…and yet…so weak.

I sighed heavily.

"How am I ever going to find hi-"

"Here." Alice said walking through the door with a small envelope.

"What's this?"

"Plane tickets duh!"

"Plane tickets? To where?"

"Transylvania it's where Aldric is."

"What?"

"I had a vision of you getting on a plane to Transylvania earlier but I didn't know why but I had another just now of you meeting someone and you asked if there name was Aldric and they said yes."

"Why didn't you tell me about the plane ride before?"

"Because you were gone when I had it and you wouldn't have cared if I told you about it when you got back nor would you have believed me."

Once again, Alice was right and she had it all planned out too.

"Thanks Ali." I said pulling her into a tight hug, she was such a good sister.

"Of course" she said hugging me back.

"Please take care of Bella while I'm gone."

"I won't let her out of my sight"

"She's in good hands Edward." Carlisle said nodding.

"Thank you both…"I said.

I then turned back to Bella and gently stroked her cheek, she was still so soft. I bent over and kissed her forehead gently, I felt a pang go through my heart from its warmth. I went lower then and captured her lips in mine; once again she kissed me back in her sleep. She was so sweet, how I love her.

Then I turned and left, knowing that whether or not I returned alone would decide her fate.

**And of course thanks to my wonderful Beta Loulabelle! you did a great job this chapter would probably not make any sense without you lol thanks!**


	16. question

**Hello all my wonderful fans! Sorry for doing this to you but alas no this is not the next chapter in sick but I promise it should come out soon I'm almost done with it. I honestly hate it when authors do this but I kept thinking about so sorry. Anyway straight to the point as much as I love my fanfic I have other writings that are not fanfics and I was wondering if anyone would be interested and if I should upload them. I did this once before and although they liked the story some people got annoyed that it wasn't a fanfic and said I should put it on fictionpress which I did and sadly got no response. Anyway, if you guys would be interested then ill upload them but I really don't want to make anyone mad cause they are not fanfics. Again sorry it's not a new chapter but it'll be out soon promise. If your interested please just let me know in a review or PM if you really want too. Oh and thank you all for your support with Sick it means so much to me! And sorry again!**

**-liz864**


	17. Chapter 15

**Hey guys I managed to finish this chapter a lot quicker than I thought when I put my question up yesterday so here it is! Sorry for the delay of course, and in regards to my last post I've decided to upload one of my stories after my wonderful beta is done with it, I don't know what I'm going to call it yet but I'll probably post something in Sick to let you guys know about it. Well as always please enjoy and review!**

I never did like flying, and now I had a reason to hate it even more. The infinite patience that immortality and sleep less nights grants my kind did nothing for me now. Actually, since Bella came into my life it had all but disappeared. I was either too eager to see her that a stranger would assume I had no patience at all or I was content, holding her safely in my arms.

But where was this wonderful patience now when I needed it the most? This plane

ride felt as it would never end.

Each moment I spent on this horrid machine took me further and further away from Bella, my Bella, my heart...

I could feel an invisible force trying to pull me back, but I knew that if I wanted to save her, to keep my promise to her, I had to stay and find this vampire.

I hope she was okay, maybe even feeling a little better. I missed the beautiful glow that surrounded her, her large bright smile, and her voice, so like that of angels.  
I closed my eyes and tried to remember better times with my beloved.

"Edward?" My heart called.

We were laying contently in each other's arms in our meadow. It was shortly after we made our agreement and I gave her my ring, it looked so gorgeous on her.

She lay on top of my chest while I kept my arms securely around her, holding her as tight to myself as I could without causing her pain.

She had her head laying right above my heart, which sometimes felt like it was beating when she was around.

I never felt so happy; I didn't know such joy and happiness could exist, especially for a monster like me.

"Why me Edward?"

"What do you mean my heart?"

"I mean...why did you pick me? You could have any girl you wanted"

Ah, so we were going to have this conversation again. We've been over this a million times, would she ever see it? What a glorious and beautiful person she was? How kind and caring she was? No, probably not. Then again I don't think she ever will or maybe she just liked to hear me say it, either way I had no problem reminding her.

"My Bella, words cannot describe how wonderful you truly are. You are the most selfless, caring, kind, sweet, innocent, beautiful creature I have ever met in my long life, and those are only a few of the things I love about you. You are my love, my heart, my life. Without you I am completely nothing I need you now and forever to be able to go on. I love you my Bella now, forever, and beyond."

With the biggest smile I have ever seen on her gorgeous face she leaned down and kissed me, putting all of her love for me into it.

With a violent bump of the airplane we landed, abruptly interrupting my daydream of days gone by. I could almost swear I was asleep...

I quickly made my way off the plane and out the airport, having no luggage made the process much quicker.

I quickly broke into a run and made my way to the woodsy area, flying through the trees.

From what I could gather from Alice's vision Aldric was somewhere within the forest in a small log cabin. The problem was that could be anywhere in this state. It didn't matter though I would find him.

I wasn't sure how long I was running for but eventually came across a clue, a dead deer. But this was no ordinary dead deer; it had been dead for a few days and already decayed quiet a bit it also looked like someone tried to bury it. Had I been human I surely would have missed it. What made it a clue though, was that it had been completely drained of all its blood; it was typical sight really for my family, sad yet typical.

I was about to take off again when I felt a buzz go off in my pocket, I took my phone out to see Alice's name flash on the screen.

"What is it Alice? Is Bella okay? Did something happen? Did you see something? What was it?" I rambled as panic filled me.

"Calm down Edward nothing happened I called to tell you I see you getting very lost I suggest you go in the opposite direction you're thinking right now."

"But Alice I found a dead deer-"

"I know I saw it too just trust me I think he buried it there to throw people off should they find it."

I thought about it for a second and it seemed logical. I also remembered one of our family's mottos: never bet against Alice.

"Alright Alice, how is Bella?"

"The same really oh and your not going to like what she's about to do."

"What is she-?"

I suddenly heard a lot of rustling on the phone, what is the world?

"Edward?" I my sweet angel croaked, I say the word croaked because her voice had somehow become hoarser since I last heard it.

"Bella! What are doing!? You should be resting!"

"It's not that difficult to talk on a phone Edward."

"But your throat, I know how much pain you must be in because of it and talking certainly can not be helping"

"It's fine Edward." She was lying, I could tell. Even on a phone she was awful at it.

"Bella..." I started, suddenly remembering I left her without a goodbye

"I'm so sorry for leaving you like this my love-"

"Its okay Edward, I forgive you I understand why you left I probably would have done the same thing if I were you. I just wanted you to know that I love you more than anyone or anything, you mean the world to me Edward, more actually, and even though I miss you so much I know you'll be home soon with a cure, I have faith in you Edward"

Could there be a more wonderful person out there? My Bella knew exactly what to say when I needed her and she couldn't even use her voice.

"My Bella, my love, my heart I love you more than a person or animal could love another. You are my sun, my moon, my sky, my sea my everything. Without you I am nothing, worse than nothing and I would not want to live one fraction of a second without you."

"Why Edward I had no idea you felt this way, what ever am I going to tell Jasper" Alice giggled.

"Ugh...Alice" I groaned while pinching the bridge of my nose, that was not meant for anyone but Bella.

"Did she hear any of it?"

"She heard the whole thing you're on speaker, I'm afraid that little speech wore her voice out though so I'm back!"

I felt a pain shoot through my chest at Alice's words; I knew I shouldn't have let her talk.

"Oh don't be sad Edward; she's grinning like a fool."

I knew the mental image I had of her was nothing compared to the real thing, still the thought of her smile made my crooked grin that she adored so much spread across my face.

"Oh! Now she's blushing!" Alice exclaimed.

I couldn't hold back my laugh, how I loved her blush, how I loved her!

"Alice how did she manage to get the phone from you?" I wondered. She wasn't very strong to begin with and the illness completely shot her strength, no way could she take on a vampire, even if it was one as small as Alice.

"Well..." Alice started.

"...Well?"

"She was going to throw her juice on my outfit Edward! Juice stains!"

"Does it matter? You never wear the same thing twice anyway"

"Yes it matters! I will not have stained clothes Edward!"

"Fine Alice please just tell Bella that I love her and I'll be home soon"

"Speaker remember?"

"Goodbye Alice, I love you Bella, my angel, my hea-" I heard a click on the other end

How nice she hung up on me. I suppose she saw all the romantic poetry filling my head that I was going to tell Bella and decided I should wait until she was better. I suppose she is right.

Finished with my phone call to my love I took off in a fast sprint, opposite of course of were I originally planned on going.

It would seem that Alice was right again because in no less than ten minutes I was at the doorstep of a small rundown cottage.

_A vampire_ I heard Aldric think _what could he want?_

At least I knew this was the right place.

I made a short stride over to the door and knocked; even though he was aware of my presence I decided I should still be polite.

In no less than a second Aldric was at the door.

"Yes?" he asked.

Carlisle was right he did appear old even for a vampire, he skin seemed so much frailer than mine but I knew it was just as hard.

I wondered if the same would happen to me when I reached his age.

His eyes were what caught me though, they were gold just like mine, but they seemed so…heavy, like something was weighing down on him…something that happened some time ago.

"Hello I'm sorry to disturb you; my name is Edward Cullen I-"

"Did you say Cullen?" he asked, slightly shocked.

I nodded.

"Then you know Carlisle?"

"I'm his adopted son"

"His son...I see...well any friend of Carlisle's is a friend and that goes double for family"

I couldn't help but smile, finally things were looking up he would no doubt heal my Bella, she's family too.

"What can I do for you?"

"Well you see my fiancé is very ill and basically..."

"Dying?" He said finishing the sentence for me.

A shot of pain wracked through my body when he said it.

"Yes..."

"So she's a human?"

"Yes, I know its wrong but please I love her more than anything she means the world to me." I was a little surprised at how desperate I sounded; I thought I'd be able to hide it better. But then again this was Bella who was I kidding?

"She's going to die someday unless…"

"I am the dates been set, I just can't do it yet I made a promise to her and I have to keep it before she is changed"

Something strange was going on, I noticed the more and more we talked about it the angrier he became.

_He's wasting his time with this girl_ he thought.

"So you want me to heal her?" I could detect some anger in his voice.

"Yes please I'm begging you I'll do anything"

"Do yourself a favor kid and dumped her before she dumps you and then dies." He spat then slammed the door in my face.

**Thanks so much to my** **great Beta Loulabelle! You've been so helpful and supportive thank you!**


	18. Chapter 16

**Hey guys sorry this took so long, just like my other chapter *sigh*. This chapter was really important though and it affected future events and im alos lazy sry though! i really do love you guys and all your reviews! they mean so much to me and are the only reason i update when i do! so please enjoy and review!**

**Also id like to make a side note, in regards to the notice i posted about other stories i have posted one under twilight its called No Hope though like in the notice its not a fanfic its completely my own work and id really appreciate it if you guys would go look at it because ive only gotten one review! please! its the first thing i ever wrote and i really wanna know what ppl think so please check it out!**

No! No! No! This cannot be happening! He cannot refuse me! Refuse Bella! He

must save her! He must!

There were a lot of emotions that I could have felt at that time sadness, despair, hopelessness, but all I could focus on was the anger coursing through my veins.

It must have destroyed the rational part of my brain as the next thing I knew I was breaking through the scrap of wood he called a door.

I guess he wasn't expecting it because be turned around abruptly with a look of shock on his face.

Anger was the only thing coursing through my veins and I'm sure he could tell by the deadly expression on my face.

I was crouched down and ready to attack at a moments notice. I was the lion protecting his lamb.

"HOW DARE YOU!? HOW DARE YOU REFUSE ME!?" I yelled throwing him against the wall. It was cracking around him from impact and the force I was applying to him.

"YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH!"

"Everyone has their sob story Edward." He said.

"SHUTUP!" I said as I hit him across the face.

"YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!" I screamed.

Maybe I was taking this a bit far, after all I'm fairly sure I could have convinced him if I tried to reason with him. But I was too angry to think straight and I had been through too much. And not just with Bella, my entire life I had been through too much. The never ending years of solitude and loneliness, being a monster for eternity, the brief period I had left Carlisle...too much.

But none of it really mattered after Bella. She was my light, my savior, my angel. The one who made my torturous life seem not that bad. She made me happy. I never thought I would be happy after I woke up that day in the hospital.

"You don't understand..." I started to sob, releasing him.

The sadness and pain I had expected before was entering my body as the anger dissipated.

I fell to the floor on my hands and knees in front of him. I was no longer a lion, I was a dog, begging for help.

"Please...I'm begging you please." I was on the verge of dry sobbing.

"Why do you want to marry a human so badly?"

"Because I love her! She means everything to me!"

"Ha..." He laughed.

"Love doesn't exist boy, its nothing but a lie."

"No I love her with all of my cold body, my dead heart, with everything I have!"

"Lovely." He spat sarcastically.

"Please! I'll do anything! Just save her please!"

"You should thank me boy I'm doing you a favor, she would have dumped you eventually."

"No she would never."

"How can you be so sure?"

"BECAUSE I ALREADY LEFT HER AND IT NEARLY KILLED US BOTH!"

That finally shut up him up as his face became hard and contorted with pain.

"...It was a mistake, I left her in order to protect her...I-I thought she wasn't safe with me...when I returned she was a shell of her former shelf, on the brink of suicide!...I was no better off."

He was silent for sometime as he processed my story and let it sink in.

He eventually made his way over to a small mantle over a tiny fire, I hadn't even noticed it before.

On the mantle was a photo of Aldric, with his arm wrapped securely around a woman.

He slowly raised his hand and stroked the photo. He looked so happy in the photo and so did the woman, it reminded me of Bella and I. They were gazing so lovingly and happily at one another.

"Love makes idiots of us all, no matter what we are." He said.

"Believe me boy, love dies, the flame of love, the spark you feel, that tingle you get whenever you two touch...ITS NOTHING BUT A LIE!" He said as he slammed his fist down on the mantle. He took a large chunk out of it and made the picture fall but he caught it before I even saw his hand move.

He let out a heavy sigh as he put it back on the mantle.

I made my way over to him slowly.

I get a better look at the woman in the picture, I'll admit she was beautiful, but still nothing compared to my angel.

She had long, wavy, blonde hair, it reminded me a little of Rosalie's, this woman's was a little darker though, and I could tell just from the paleness of her skin she was too a vampire. She must have been in her late forties when she was changed. The two made a nice couple.

What surprised me though was she had topaz eyes in the photo, just like my family. I hadn't noticed until now that Aldric's were the same both in the picture and in real life.

"What's her name?" I asked him quietly.

"…Elaina"

I was curious as to what could have accord between this man and this woman, they seemed so happy in the photo, what could have happened to cause the pain in his eyes I now saw? I didn't know if I should ask though, who was I to pry?

"She was to me as the human is to you, if not more." As if a man could love a woman more than I loved Bella.

"I loved her so much…with everything I had."

"…What happened?" I asked him.

"…She left."

"…Why?"

"…I don't know." I could tell from his tone and thoughts he truly didn't know.

"Well what happened."

He heaved a heavy sigh as he started his story.

"She was the sweetest person I had ever met, well vampire actually she was already changed when we met, I'll never forget that day. I was on break from the hospital I was working at, I'm sure your father told me about my medical background."

I nodded.

"Even though I didn't need the break I had to keep up the charade, you know how it goes. I was sitting outside on a rather cloudy day so I took the opportunity to get some fresh air away from the blood. And there she was, across the street, she took the unneeded breath right out of me. The entire universe was pulling me towards her and I had to look down to make sure I hadn't actually moved."

It didn't sound anything like when I had met Bella, then again there were other circumstances to factor in, with her being human and all. I wondered if this is what I would have felt like if I had met her as a vampire, I had a feeling it would be rather similar. The impossible pull, the need to be near her.

His story was making me miss my sweet Bella, I needed to be near, have her in my arms, they've felt so heavy and empty since I had left.

I could tell though this story was causing him both happiness and pain. Happiness to remember his love and sadness from her disappearance.

"I was at a loss for words and in awe by her beauty; I didn't know what to do. But somehow I was coherent enough to notice a car speeding towards her, something she didn't seem to notice."

"How could she not notice?"

"I later on found out it was because she wasn't paying attention, she was trying to figure out why 'the handsome vampire across the street' kept staring." He said with a sad chuckle.

"Even though it wouldn't hurt her, I couldn't exactly let her get hit by a car, it wouldn't look very good when she was completely fine and the car was a wreck. So I ran as quickly as a human could and saved her, the cars swerved a bit but there was no serious damage. But the moment I gazed into her eyes, that was it and I could tell she knew it too."

I saw the look in his mind, I saw him holding a woman in his arms on the corner of street and gazing into her red eyes, and I knew, it was the same way Bella and I looked at each other.

"…Then what? I asked.

"We dated for about 5 years and one day I finally got the courage to propose, thankfully she said yes, we set a date and everything…then one day I came home from work and she was just…gone."

"…Gone?"

"She left a note…'I'm sorry, I can't. Please don't follow me' I didn't listen though, something was off, she was so happy to be getting married she was glowing with joy that very morning."

"So what happened?"

He didn't respond.

"…You gave up?"

"Essentially…a thought started to run through my mind after awhile of 'what if she was hiding? Or avoiding me' she had asked me not to follow after all."

"So you called it quits? What the hell that's bullshit if she meant that much to you, you shouldn't have just let it end, especially not like that when you know there's something else going on."

He didn't respond.

"If you love her that much you can't just stop looking you've got to keep going and find her."

Again no response.

"…If I can find her…would you save my fiance? My Bella?" I asked him.

"You won't find her."

"But what if I do?"

"You won't."

"Just answer the question."

"Fine." He said with a heavy sigh. It was clear from his thoughts that he still did not believe me, but regardless he agreed to save Bella.

"…Wait." He said, as I started to make for the door.

"What?"

"If…by some miracle you actually find her…just…just…"

He seemed to struggling to find the words, to not ask what he wanted and what was best.

"…Just tell me if she's happy…you don't even have to speak her…that will be enough for me to help Bella."

I nodded and then left.

As I started to walk and think about how I would find this woman, I didn't even bother to ask where they last departed. The home in the photo did not look like some run down cottage in the middle of the woods. But who could blame him? How could he possibly stay in a home full of so much happiness and pain?

I did feel a large amount of pity for Aldric. I would have to apologize later for my rude behavior as I could tell he truly did love this woman and how he had not gone to the Volturi and begged for death I don't know. Perhaps he felt the need to stick around, and live through the turmoil in case she ever needed him. Yes that made sense…he was waiting…just in case. But he should not be waiting he should be out searching like I'm about to do. To just let her go, give up on her, the thought of it was enough to make me go back and hit him again. I would search every nook and crevice of this entire universe for my Bella should something like that ever occur.

I had barely made it out of the forest when I realized what a difficult task this would be, how could I find this woman with the short amount of time that I had? And in that same instant, my phone buzzed.

"Apartment 44 Rue De Varenne Paris, France." Alice said quickly in to the phone.

"What?"

"That's her address Edward."

"How did yo-"

"I had a vision of you talking to a vampire and I saw the address."

"How do you know who she is?"

"I don't know I just know you were looking for someone then I saw you at her apartment."

"Oh…thanks Alice…how's Bella?"

"There's no time for a 'how's Bella?' conversation right now you need to get moving! She's in the same condition as always but 'that' future is getting clearer! Don't bother taking the plane there's too many delays just run!"

With those words I snapped the phone shut and I took off in the fastest run I ever had.

**big thanks to my awesome beta and good friend Loulabelle! You've been so helpful with all my stories thanks!**


	19. Chapter 17

**hey im still alive yay! yeah ive been gone a really long time im not gonna deny it and im sry. ive been real busy with work and school and stuff and im sry this took forever to get up here. idk when ill have the next chapter up it may sooner or later i really dnt know alls i can really promise all of you is that i will finish this story, no matter how much time is in between chapters. Anywho i would like to thank all my wonderful fans who still read this despire my horrible updating and schedule and all the wonderful reviews you've left me, they mean so much to me. Also while on that topic, as dumb as this may sound i didnt know for the longest time that i could respond to your great reviews and i feel like the biggest bitch for not saying anything back. So from here on out i promise to get back to each and every one no matter how short, even if its a flame! thanks for reading please enjoy and review!**

I was in hell. Those were the only words I could think of to describe this torture. I had to be, there was no other explanation. I must have succumbed to the illnesses hours ago in my sleep. It would make sense considering I have just about everything in Harvard's medical book. But the pain and discomfort they brought me was still nothing compared to this.

I went to voice my opinion on this before I felt a small, cold hand clamp over my mouth.

"No talking Bella you remember what Carlisle said." Alice said.

_Alice._

I decided that if I get out of this not only will I burn her clothes and Porche like I planned; I'm going to cancel her credit cards as well, _after_ she leaves the house to go shopping of course.

"I don't know why you would want to talk though considering how much pain it supposedly causes you what are you a masochist?"

I rolled my eyes at her and tried my best to wiggle my toe free of her grasp; I wasn't surprised at all when my toe barely moved half a centimeter.

"I'm. Not. Done." She said shooting me one her most fierce death glares.

"Alice I-..What the hell!" Emmett said as he walked in the room.

Oh thank God finally someone else, I knew it was difficult for the Cullen's to stay in a hospital aside from Carlisle, but how could they leave me with just Alice for this long!? Didn't she need to hunt too!?

"Well Bella…" Emmett said walking over to my try not to smile "Don't you look pretty." He said and patted my head once before he burst out laughing.

I rolled my eyes at him too but I don't think I could have blamed him, I probably looked ridiculous.

Since Edward had left to find Aldric the Cullen's had all but abandoned me with none other than Alice. And even though I'm sick and supposedly dying in a hospital bed it still wasn't enough of an excuse for her not to turn me into a Barbie. Actually I was probably more like a Barbie now considering she stopped me every time I tried to move and covered my mouth before I could even think of what it was I was going to say.

So in that time Alice decided to give me a completely different hairstyle, cover my face in makeup like it was her own canvas, and give me a detailed manicure and pedicure. She knows how much I hate this stuff! I swear she's getting enjoyment out of the fact that I'm on doctor's orders to not talk and keep my movement minimal.

Emmett was still in hysterics practically on the floor, Alice shot him a dirty look and walked over to him.

"Emmett." She said darkly.

"…Yes?" He said immediately calming down, he knew that tone and so did I.

"Are you saying that Bella looks ugly? That all the work I did on her is bad?" Oh god she has that look in her eye.

"It's just…well…"

"Well what?"

"She's like…all dolled up and ready to go out…but she's laying in hospital bed in a gown…it's a little weird to see."

"So now my work is weird?!"

"No! No! its beautiful Alice really she's never looked more gorgeous!"

"So you're saying all the other times I did her makeup she didn't look gorgeous!?"

"What! No! I never said that!"

I could tell that no matter what Emmett said Alice could twist it around to make him sound bad. I could also tell that Alice was only playing with him. And lastly, I could tell Emmett had no idea.

"Ali I'm sorry I swear your work is great!"

Within a second her anger was gone and Alice face suddenly became full of sadness and despair.

"How could you Emmett! I-I worked so hard!" Alice said as she pretended to dry sob.

"Buts it looks pretty Ali! Really she does!"

"Y-your just saying that"

"Please Ali I'm sorry what do you want me to do to make it up to you?"

"Well…" She sniffed.

"Well what? Anything I swear."

"W-would you let me give you a makeover too?"

Emmett's face fell a little and when Alice didn't get a response right away she started dry sob again, only harder this time.

"Okay! Okay! Fine! But later alright?"

"Okay." Alice said as she smiled one of the brightest smiles I have ever seen.

"Love you Emmett." She said and kissed his cheek.

She started to make her way to out the door when she turned back to me and winked before leaving.

I was trying my hardest to not burst out in to a giant fit of laughter, laughter that would not only cause me more pain but would also give away Alice's act.

"The things I do for my little sister…" Emmett said running a hand through his hair as he took a sit beside me.

"But that's how we Cullen's are; we take care of each other."

I looked at him curiously, indicating for him to continue.

"Look we may all be married and all gaga over our mates and stuff but we all still look out for each other like a family should. That's why I'm here. You're already part of this family so we need to watch over you too little sis."

I felt tears come to my eyes and giant ball of fire form in my throat as my heart swelled with love for this family and for Emmett after hearing such kind words.

"Oh jeez Bella I'm sorry! Please don't cry!"

I tried to push myself towards him a little but was having a hard time; thankfully he picked up on it quickly, for once, and pulled me into a tight hug.

"…Just to clarify your crying because you're happy right?"

I nodded against his chest.

"Okay good."

I was grateful to have someone as good and nice as Emmett there with me, he's really going to make a wonderful brother. Wait, who am I kidding, he already was.

Whether or not he knew though, my tears of joy suddenly turned to tears of sadness. And I knew why too, I missed Edward, no I needed him. I wanted him to come back and take care of me; he was the only one who made me feel even the slightest bit better.

I wondered why I hadn't had this hysterical breakdown earlier, when I thought he had had left me once again. Thankfully Alice was there the second I opened my eyes to explain the situation. I then realized that the entire time he was away, minus the phone call, I had mostly been annoyed because of Alice's makeover party. I guess there was more to it than her having fun, I'll have to thank her.

Look at what I've been reduced to, me thanking Alice for a makeover, I must be sicker than even Carlisle thinks.

But now that she was gone and the emptiness I always felt when he was away was making itself known, I was hysterical.

This stupid illness is just making his leaving all the more worse! It was driving me nuts! Of course I have complete faith in Edward that he will find a cure but I don't like being so helpless. It's not fair to the Cullen's to have to take care of me 24/7 like this, especially in a hospital. I can only imagine how poor Jasper is holding up, if he's even here.

"…I-I'm sorry Em." I rasped.

"Don't be sorry" He said "And hey no talking! Do you want me to get in more trouble?"

I scowled while wiping away my tears.

"Hey…come on cheer up Bells, Eddie will back soon and you'll be up and at 'em in no time."

He's lucky Edward wasn't there, he hates his nickname.

I saw a pen and notepad on the table beside me and decided that if I wasn't allowed to talk I could at least write to them, so I grabbed the pad and got to work.

'_It's just I miss him so much Em, he was the only thing really making this illness bearable. And this isn't fair to you guys at all. You should go home.'_

"What? Are you crazy? Do you have any idea how mad Edward will get?"

'_I can handle him.'_

He ran a hand through his curls and let out a heavy sigh.

"Bella, did you ever think that maybe we want to be here for you and help you?"

'_Yes but it's not fair for you to have to be around so much blood just for my sake.'_

"Jeez give us a little credit will ya? Were stronger than you think"

'_I didn't mean it like that I know how strong you but still it must be hard.'_

He rolled his eyes at that one.

"It's good practice in my eyes, it's the only way were going to build up a resistance to it. Besides if it gets to be too much, we go for a little bit and come back."

'_So you're really all okay?'_

He nodded.

'_Even Jasper?'_

"He's…managing as best he can."

'_Tell him to go'_

"Bella-"

I shook my head before he could finish. It wasn't fair for Jasper to have to go through this just for me, its not that I didn't want him here; I just didn't want him to have to suffer so much just for me.

Emmett let out a heavy sigh before he got up and walked out of the room.

With Emmett, gone my pain made itself fully known. Since I finally had some privacy I started crying harder and it hurt more than ever. Why did Edward have to leave in order to cure me? Why couldn't there have been another way? One where he could stay with me?

There I go again…being selfish. I should be grateful I have someone who's willing to do this for me and here I am crying hysterically because I'm not getting it the way I want. I was worse than a baby who's not getting there bottle. But still…I needed Edward, if this sickness doesn't kill me, surely his absence will.  
"Bella?"

I was crying too hard to hear the door open and my eyes were too blurry from the tears to notice a figure step in the room, but I did recognize the voice.

"J-Jasper?" I could not believe how bad it hurt to talk, never before has my throat been in such pain. I wondered if this is what the burn in all vampires' throats feels like. If so, I could only imagine what the Cullen's feels like, having to live off animal blood. It didn't matter though, if an eternity of this pain meant being with Edward forever, I would gladly suck it up.

"Yeah…Don't talk Bella I know how much it's hurting you." He said.

He unfortunately knew more than I would like him too. I guess I was going to have to write my plea down again.

'_Jasper please you should go you don't need to put yourself through this just for me. I know how hard it must for you to be in the hospital, surrounded by all this blood and then me on top of it. Not too mention, with Edward gone I am an emotional wreck! Plus with all my physical pain that must be making you suffer too! Oh god Jasper I never realized what I doing to you I'm so sorry pl-'_

Before I could finish with my rant on paper, Jasper ripped the pen out of my hand and tossed it across the room.

Then he did something that I thought he wouldn't do until I was changed, he hugged me.

"J-Jasper?" I croaked.

"Didn't I just tell you not to tell talk?"

I felt a wave of calmness flow over me and I knew it was him for which I was grateful.

"Bella relax you should give me a little more credit. I'm stronger than you think, I've been to hospitals before, and it's not easy but it's tolerable. Plus it's really just good practice for me in the end. With Alice and my whole family here, I know they won't let me do anything stupid." He explained.

"B-but what about me?" I asked that one really hurt, I never thought I'd have such a hard time saying one sentence.

"Edward wasn't kidding when he said you never listen. The virus or viruses made themselves known in your bloodstream long ago and made it more tolerable to be around you, you still smell good, just less appetizing, which is why I'm able to do things like this." He said squeezing me a bit. "I imagine to Edward though you still smell just as wonderful, but then again you are his singer."

"E-emotions." He still hadn't touched that subject, but I didn't think I'd be able to get through a full sentence.

"You forget how long I've been alive and how long I've had to deal with my power, I'm use to dealing with emotions both good and bad, especially living where I do. It's really not as bad as you might think, at least for me it isn't, but like I've said I've had a _long _time to deal with it."

I guess that made sense, he has been around since the civil war.

"Now listen Bella I don't care how badly you beg or what you say I. Am. Not. Leaving. And you can't make me so don't bother. I know I don't say or show that much, but you really do mean a lot to me and I'm glad that I'm getting someone like you to be my new sister. But I don't say or show it that much because you mean so much to me, I don't want to hurt you Bella, I trust myself enough to be around you know when your blood's not at full force, but when your strong and healthy and smell so appetizing I don't. But I want you to join our family so much that I keep my distance until one day when we will be equals."

His words were bringing tears to my eyes again, so much that I barely noticed when he started talking again.

"It may sound silly but you don't know what a relief you are to me. You have brought my brother such happiness and joy that I am forever grateful to you. No one besides me really knows just how bad my brother was before you, I felt all of his pain and loneliness constantly, and it bothered me that my brother was constantly feeling that way. But now he's just so happy all the time. And he just can't wipe that stupid grin off his face, I never once complained about always feeling his emotions but really it's a big weight lifted off my shoulders."

I was now crying again, but I felt so happy that I knew I shouldn't be crying, I also knew that it was just him though trying to make me stop crying.

He grabbed a box of tissues off the table and handed them to me. I took one and started to wipe my eyes off and blew my nose, it sounded like an air horn, and we both couldn't help but laugh, even though it hurt me.

All this crying and comforting was starting to get to me and I suddenly realized how tired I was.

"You need to rest Bella."

I wanted to argue, I really did but I just didn't have the energy so I gave up and lay down.

"Sleep Bella, hopefully by the time you wake up Edward will be back with a Aldric and this will all be over."

I gave him the best smile I could and let him feel the gratitude and love I felt for my soon to be brother.

He smiled back a little and sent some love my way as well.

"Th-Thank you Jasper." I croaked.

He rolled his eyes at me.

"No thank you Bella, for completing our family." He gave me one last hug before he left the room.

I was so blessed and grateful to be getting to join such and wonderful family and have such a wonderful man in my life. I was now more determined than ever to fight off this illness and survive.

I closed my eyes and quickly drifted off to dreams of my one and only love.

**I hope you all liked it i wanna give a big thanks to my beta Loulabelle** **she's been such a big help with this tory all the time! Now that your done reading this you should go on over to her profile and check out her story Freedom and Fun, its very different from this but its really very good! one of my favorite!**


	20. Chapter 18

**Ugh...words cannot express how deeply sorry i am to everyone for this delay in my story. Im sure somewhere along the line i loss many fans and it does sadden me quite abit however i cant really blame them. Im not going to try and come up with a million excuses about why this wasnt updated sooner i will however be honest. Once i graduated high i started to get alot more hours at my work and was almost never home and once i had managed to finally sit down and write this chapter i had repeatedly lost the file. I had to re-write this chapter about 2 or 3 times because not only did i lose it several times bt after i had written something new i managed to recover the file so i had to read them over and combine them. On tope of all these technical issues i was trying to get ready for college which i have only just started. Again i am not using this as an excuse im just letting everyone know what happened and why it took so long. Again i truly sorry the long delay i will try to update sooner but i do no want to make any empty promises to my remaining readers. For those of you who are still following my story i would like to thank you very as i have done in each previous chapter, if not fo ryou i would have given up on this story long ago. Now that i feel ive gotten the apology note out of the way please review and enjoy!**

While I was running I was able to come up with a few theories on my species as well the human species. If you were to take a human and turn them into a vampire all of their physical abilities would increase ten-fold. Now, If you were to take said vampire and have them find their mate then put said mate in a life-threatening situation that vampire's abilities would then increase to a point where they could transcend time and space.

My proof? The fact that I was able to make to Paris from Transylvania in less than three hours. Who needs planes when you have love pumping through your veins?

Paris always was one of my favorite places to come visit and I had plans to bring Bella here after she was changed, as well as many other places. In order to make sure my plans of these trips, as well as my existence, still happen, I needed to track down this woman Elaina. And since Paris was one of my favorite places, I knew exactly where it was Alice was talking about when she said the address, another plus of being a vampire. Photographic memory of every moment in my existence.

The one thing that struck me as odd was I remembered that area of Paris to not as nice as others. And if I was thinking of the right apartment building, which I was 100 percent sure I was unless they had changed it. It had always been a popular building for drug users as well as dealers. What this Elaina woman could be doing in this building was beyond me.

Nevertheless, I quickly made my way to the building and was of course, not surprised to find it in worse condition than I remember it from years before. Not to mention the closer I got, the worse the place smelled, it reeked of almost every drug imaginable.

I made my way to the front entrance and was stopped by a very shady looking man in an oversized leather jacket. He was hiding his face in the collar of the jacket, as if he didn't look shady enough.

_Weird to see kid like this in these parts._

He must be referring to the way I was dressed. It was obvious I was of a much higher class than him just by looking at us standing next to each other. Despite the torture I had put my clothes through during my run. I guess I owe Alice a thanks.

_He must be loaded I can definitely sell something to him._

Then again maybe it would have been better for me to come in drags.

"Hey kid." He sneered.

That one really never gets old.

"What?" I snapped, I had little time for this imbecile and his ridiculous sales.

"Wanna buy some reefer?"

Reefer? Is that what they are calling it these days?

"No thank you I have other business to attend here." I said as I tried to make my way past him but instead the idiot decided to block the doorway. It took all of my willpower to not just knock this idiot over and trample over him. I had to remember though there was a vampire here and I don't know how thirsty she was and if she even still stuck to her vegetarian diet, it would not be wise to draw blood.

"You're not going to find any other type of business here."

_Dam it, if I can just get him to say yes I can sell him the laced shit and rob the little punk. _

Ah, so that was what he was getting at.

"I have a friend here that I need to speak with."

"Yeah? What's his name?" _Lying punk. _

I can handle being called a kid; I've dealt with it for about a century. I can even handle being called a punk, but it rarely ever came up, that was the name people usually gave Emmett. But if someone stands in the way of my Bella and insults me then they are crossing the line.

I grabbed the fool by his collar and slammed him against the side wall, being careful not to draw blood yet still cause him a descent amount of pain.

"Listen." I began as I glared directly in to idiot's eyes. "I have business to attend here, business that does not include you or any of your ridiculous plants now if you don't get out of my way I will see to it that you are thrown in jail and locked away forever am I making myself clear?" I said as I pushed him into the wall.

"Y-you don't scare me kid they won't listen to you."

"Really? Who do you think they are going to believe? A wealthy, upper-class young boy with a family to back him or lone drug-dealer who lives in the pits of Paris?"

He didn't say anything after that nor did he think anything.

"That's what I thought." I said as I dropped him and finally made my way inside the building.

I wanted to vomit as soon as I entered; the place reeked of all kinds of drugs, some that were being made even now. There were holes on the wall and stains on the carpet consisting of god know what. People were sitting outside some of the doors completely passed out or watching the rats and cockroaches run around during their high.

I made my way as quickly as I could to do the door number and gave it a knock.

"Hello?" I said.

No response.

She knew I was here though, she knew that I was outside the building talking to that fool of a dealer, but she hasn't made a move yet.

_He's here _she thought_ Oh god what does he want from me? This must be it._

As much as I didn't want to, I was pressured for time and she wasn't giving me too much of a choice, so I ripped the handle off and made my way inside. Any human in the hallway was too delirious to notice what I had done.

The suite was completely barren and only consisted of one room; there was not even a bathroom anywhere. The walls were completely white washed with numerous cracks in them. There was only one window in the room that overlooked the area from which I had come in.

But she was there, in the middle of the room with her back to me, sitting on top of an old box. The long blond hair that I had seen in the photo had lost its sheen and now seemed dead and dirty. She had on a sundress that seemed so old it looked as though it may turn too dust any second.

"…Are you Elaina?" I asked quietly.

All at once her body tensed and snapped back to look at me, it looked as though she hadn't moved in years.

"Who are you? How do you know my name? Did James send you? Oh god he did didn't-"

"Did you say James?" I snapped, cutting her off.

"...Yes" She mumbled.

"How do you know him?"

"He is my ex and my reason for be in this horrible place did he not send you?"

"No...He did not, he's dead I killed him." Part of me could not believe they had once dated, but I caught a few snippets of their relationship as they quickly played through her head, confirming her statement. Still it struck me as odd though, that someone like Elaina would ever be with James. From the few photos I had seen of her and memories from Aldric, Elaina appeared to be a very kind-hearted, unlike most of kind. Plus, Aldric and her followed our lifestyle, but perhaps James and Elaina had dated before she met Aldric and James had met Victoria?

No, it still didn't make any sense. From the few photos I had seen of her and memories from Aldric, Elaina appeared to be a very kind-hearted, unlike most of our kind. Despite what had occurred between them, Aldric still spoke highly of her and mentioned how gentle and kind she was, how once she discovered our method never once even thought of having human blood again. She always did what she could to help people.

James on the other hand, was about as sick as our kind came. A ruthless tracker, hunting down and toying with his prey until he could practically taste the fear within them once he finally sank his disgusting teeth in their necks. Victoria was no better either, an evil witch that liked to watch her meal squirm.

So what could James have possibly seen in Elaina?

"De...de...dead?" She stuttered suddenly, interrupting my thoughts

"Yes." I told her.

As the word left my mouth a vast amount of emotions suddenly came across her face shock, pain, sadness, despair, relief, happiness, and a few others that came and went so fast I couldn't even figure them out. I'm sure that if Jasper were anywhere near her he would have collapsed form the weight of it all, much like she suddenly did.

She fell first onto her knees and then her hands as she began dry heaving as heavily as our kind possibly could.

_He's dead, he's dead, he's dead _she chanted in her head.

I was unsure what to do at this point, I had no idea why she reacted this way upon hearing news of his death, I wanted to offer her some type of comfort but she barely knew me. I had a feeling that James was the cause of this sudden outburst, she did, after all say that he was the reason she was here. I gently made my way over to her and knelt in front of her, she must have heard me because she looked up at me, her eyes heavy with tears that would never fall.

"I-I suppose you've come to kill me too…" She said.

"No of course not, in fact I've to rescue you…sort of." I suppose you could call this a rescue mission right?  
"Rescue me? But you don't even know me, why would you rescue me?"

"I was sent by Aldric."

"A-Aldric sent you?"  
I nodded.  
Part of me regretted informing her on that part of the information because she broke into another wave of hysterics.

"W-Why would he send you to rescue m-me? I-I'm sure he told you what I did,

h-he must hate me for it."  
"Yes he did inform me on what happened, but I can assure you he does not hate you, in fact, believe or not he is still very much in love with you." Despite his outburst I could see in his eyes how very much in love with her he still was and how would give anything to have her back. I knew he only stopped searching for her because he thought she didn't want him, but, clearly she did.

"How can he still love me after what I did to him?"

"Because…sometimes when you love a person so much your willing to forgive any harm they may do to you as long as you still will want them and they can have you in the end." I told her as I remembered how easily my Bella had forgiven me and taken me back after I committed the horrible sin of leaving her. None of it really seem to matter to her that much afterwards, she had me and I had her, that's what mattered, and neither of us were going anywhere away from each other anytime soon, which was my exact reason for being here.  
"But how? How could he?"

"The only answer I can really give you is that he loves you and mean that much to him but honestly…it's probably something you won't ever understand until you are the one who has to forgive him." Even I still have hard time understanding how she took me back so easily. But then I just think about how if she were the one to leave me and then come back I would not just welcome her with open arms, I would grabbed hold of her and never release her from my arms so neither of us would ever have to go through it again.  
She did not say anything at first, she just looked at me with a blank expression as she thought over what I said, but I could tell from the look in her eyes she knew I was right.

"Besides…I'm sure there's more to this story, I'm sure you have a reason for what you did to him." I said breaking the silence.

"Perhaps." She said standing up as she pulled herself together "But honestly, how can you expect me to believe you? I don't even know who you are."

"My name is Edward, Edward Cullen."

"…Did you say Cullen?" She seemed a bit taken aback by name, but then again most of our kind was, Carlisle is famous in our world after all.

"Yes, and to answer your next question yes I do know Carlisle, I am his adoptive son and he is also the one who changed me." I told her.

"How did you-"

"Know what you were going to ask? It's my special talent." I said, tapping my temple "Mind reader."

"Ah…I see I'll have to remember that."

"Well…seeing as how you know Carlisle, and are his son nonetheless, I suppose I could trust you. Although I never got the chance to meet him, Carlisle was never one to lie from what I heard."

"And what you heard is correct."

"Still, I don't understand why you were sent for me, Carlisle and Aldric have not spoken in years and it's not like him to just up and ask him for a favor like this out of the blue."

"It's not a favor, we have a deal."

"A deal? What kind of deal?"

"I find out if you are happy or not…and he cures my sick fiancé." I felt a sharp pang go through my heart as images of my sick Bella ran through my mind, I just hoped that she was asleep right now, at least then she wouldn't be suffering as much.

"…If I am happy?" She said confused.  
"After first reading your note, Aldric didn't believe that it was real and set out to find you, however, as time went on he never found you he began to think that perhaps you did not want him anymore and were going so far as to hide from him."

I watched her already sad face fall further hearing the news.

"Well Edward I can tell you that you were right, there are other reasons surrounding my departure."

"I'm not surprised."

"Leaving him like that had and always will be the hardest, most cruel, horrible thing I ever did; I love him so much and always will."

"As he does you."

"Will you please take me to him Edward? I don't know if what you say is true about him still loving me, but I know I love him with all of my dead heart and he at least deserves to know the truth, even if he doesn't want me anymore."

I all but jumped at the chance, quite literally actually as I threw her onto my back, jumped out the window facing the side alley and once again began a manic dash o his house.

"My goodness!" she said surprised.

"Sorry I am in a bit of a hurry, like I said my fiancé is very sick."

"Wait if she's sick does that mean she's…"

"Yes, my Bella is still human."

"If she is so sick that you would go to Aldric for help why not just change her? You will be marrying her soon anyway."

"Because…I promised her a human wedding, she'll have plenty of time to have as many as she wants after she's changed, but she only has one chance at a human wedding." It was entirely a lie; I did want her to have a human wedding. It was, however, a very large lie of omission, but I did not wish to share the many reasons with her I was doing this. After all, some were just too…personal.

It seemed to be good enough for her because she no longer asked any questions on the subject, perhaps she had seen the agony written on my face though during the conversation.

"Elaina, might I ask you a question?"

"Go ahead."

"What exactly occurred between you and James?" I couldn't help but ask, it had been bothering me since she told me he was her ex.

Unfortunately for me though, she fell extremely silent and I'm sure if I looked back her face would mirror mine from before.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have asked." I told her, feeling bad.

"No its okay, I'll explain when we get to Aldric's, it's not really something I want to tell twice."

I nodded in understanding.

"Might I ask you though why you killed him?"

"…He was tracking my Bella." I told her, feeling the anger pulse through me as I thought how he almost took my Bella away from me, I used my anger as fuel to make myself run even faster.

"Why?"

"Bella's blood is very potent and smells much more appetizing than your average human, if you ever have the chance to meet her you'll understand." I explained.

"Then how can you be with her?"

"Because, even though it may be difficult at times I know it would be a much greater pain, both physically and mentally, to live in a world without her."

"You must really love her."

"With everything I am and have."

She didn't say anything afterwards but the subject of blood did bring one question to my mind.

"Elaina, do you still follow my families way of life?"

"You mean surviving off animals?"

I nodded.

"Yes of course I do, I could never go back to the old way."

"Then…how did you survive in that room for so long?"

"…Rats." She said, sighing heavily.

"Wow…that really amazing." I said shocked at the depth of her commitment.

"Even if I wanted a dealer or a user, I doubt they would have tasted that good and it would have been too difficult.

"I suppose."

The rest of the venture remained silent, and before I knew it we were back in the woods, heading towards the cottage.

"I can't believe how fast you are."

"I told you I'm pressed for time."

I began to slow down a little as the cottage came into view and felt Elaina tense around me.

"Relax…it'll be okay I promise." I said gently letting her down.

She slowly made her way towards the cottage, twitting her thumbs and staring at the ground as she walked. I heard her mumble a low "Aldric" when suddenly the door, new door might I add, swung wide open.

"Elaina…?" A shocked Aldric said from the doorway.

**Thank you to all who are still following this story. I know i say this alot but i can see why some ppl might be worried about me not finishing the story do to the delays, however i promise you that i will finish this story, ive actually gotten the rest pretty much planned out. I would also like to thank my awesome beta and friend Loulabelle, she helps make this thing make sense and easier to read. I also reccommend you check out her story _Freedom and Fun_ Its a favorite of mine. Again i apologize for the delay and thank the ppl who still take the time out to read this and review.**


	21. Chapter 21

**Hello to all surprised to hear from me? I know I am. I would like to apologize for the delay but I am not going to make up some sad, lame excuse for why it's been so long since I uploaded a chapter. Truth is I lost inspiration and interest in this story long ago but lately a few reviews from fans have revived my inspiration for a story i thought everyone had given up on. Again I apologize for the delay and I do not want to make any false promises about when the next will be up or if it will be up but I promise you all I am going to try. Enjoy. **

**Aldric's POV**

Have you ever had a love leave you? Have you ever gone so long without hearing from them or about them that you were sure they were dead? I guess those same rules don't really apply to vampires though, were not exactly easy to kill. Still, when so many years go by that you don't hear of someone what other logical conclusion could you come to other than that they are dead? After all it is not like we are impossible to kill, ask and of the Volturi.

And yet, in an instant all of my fears had been erased. Elaina, my long lost love from so long ago stood here before me. Edward some how managed to stick to his word and find her. She was just as beautiful as I remember, just as I had expected, time had not harmed her beauty at all. But I could not forget the hole she left in my heart, it's not like she had been taken from me, she left me, something I could not forget.

"Elaina…" I said.

"Aldric…" Her voice. Oh god her voice, how long has it been since I last heard such a wonderful sound!

"Elaina…I…why?" There was so many thoughts running through my head, memories of both good and bad. Questions that's I needed answered, feelings that I need to know about. And yet all I could muster in my frozen state was the simple why.

"I'm sorry Aldric." She said, if vampires could cry she would have tears running down her face. I could the dry cracking in her voice as she tried to talk.

"I-I didn't want to leave you I really didn't I'm so sorry."

"Then why?" I wanted to run to her and wrap her in my arms but I had to be careful. My heart was already open to either receive her love or be crushed by her rejection; a rejection that I knew would be the end of me.

"I-It was James."

"James? Who is James?" Had she left me for another? Oh say it isn't so! Is this eternal curse not hell enough!

"James is my ex Aldric he is the one who changed me." It was something I had always wondered about since she never told me who changed her. I had asked on a few occasions but she only said it was something she'd rather not discuss, I always let it go but now that I look back I wonder if I should not have.

"He…courted me when I was human, said I had potent blood after he turned me. He was so sweet and I was so wrapped up in his beauty I could not get enough." There was so much strain in her voice as she spoke.

"But everything changed after he turned me, he would send me out on hunts to bring him back meals and make me help him track the prey he chose to go after himself. I felt so guilty, so horrible each time I did it but he told if I loved him I would do it and at the time I thought I did."

I could see this was becoming more and more difficult as she went on, I wanted to stop her and tell her it was okay, but I had to know.

"That is until I caught him with another…I-I heard the two of them when I returned home one evening I-I couldn't believe it I-I didn't know what to do."

"Elaina…" I said trying to offer some comfort, but she just went on.

"So I ran. I ran and ran and ran as far as I could and tried to pull myself together and make some sense out of my life. It took me so long and was probably one of the hardest things I ever did but I somehow managed to make a life for myself, a life of fear that is.

"I was constantly scared and always looking over my shoulder and boarding up my windows and doors with some false hope that it'd keep him out if he found me. It was hardly a life worth living."

She slowly fixated her gaze on me and stared at my eyes, I felt as though she was peering into my soul.  
"That was until I met you, you changed everything Aldric, you made life worth living again. I had never known such happiness existed until I met you."

I knew that feeling, that's how I felt once she had come into my life.

"I'm so sorry Aldric…I-I never wanted to leave but…h-he found me."

"James?"

"Yes, he found me at our home while you were at work...h-he threatened to kill you if I didn't obey. A-Aldric I'm so sorry." It was at this point she broke down and began to sob uncontrollably she could barely hold her ground and looked like she might fall.

"Elaina, Elaina, calm down." I said as I made my way over to her. I took her by the shoulders and tried to offer some comfort.

"I'm sorry I'm so sorry Aldric." She just kept apologizing.

"Stop." I said firmly and looked at me with a slight fear in her eyes.

"Look…I'm not mad…I just need to know something."

"Anything."

"…Do you still love me?"

"O-Of course I do I-I never stopped."

That was all I needed to hear as my lips crashed down against hers. Oh god her lips, how I missed her sweet kisses. The soft silky skin of her lips against mine, sending her love for me through them, revitalizing me, giving me life once again. I knew I sent the same love to her as she clutched on to my shirt kissing me hard.

"Elaina…Elaina" I said in between kisses.  
"Aldric."

I pulled her close up against my chest as she buried her head right beneath my chin.

"I'll never let you go, never again." I told her and she clutched on to me harder.

She still sobbed slightly against my chest and I rocked her back forth gently in order to soothe her, I couldn't believe I was holding her in my arms. I owed so much to – Edward!

"Edward!" I said, looking around to realize he was nowhere to be seen.  
Elaina pulled back form chest to look as well.

"Where did he go?" She asked.

"Sorry." I suddenly heard as he appeared before us. "I thought you too could use some privacy."

"Edward…" I said as made my way over to him clasping his hand firmly in mine, excitement coursing through me.

"You don't know how much this means to me, you have given me back the one thing that matters most in my life I am forever in your debt."

He raised a hand slowly as to stop me.

"I don't want your eternal debt Aldric, I am happy to help but you already

know what I need in return."

"Oh goodness of course Bella."

"So you will help her then?"

"Anything for you or your family."

"Thank you sir."

"Please it's Aldric." I felt Elaina come over and hold on to my arm, I missed

her there.

"Do you mind if Elaina comes with us?" I was not about to leave her behind

after all this time.

"No but I must ask we leave quickly, I just received a call from my sister and Bella is in much need."

That was not an easy phone call I could tell, he was just on the border of panicking, I don't know really know how he was remaining so calm.

"Yes let us make haste."

So the three of us took off, me carrying Elaina of course, to the nearest airport. I only hoped we could make it in time and this could be a happy ending for us all.


End file.
